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Writing Samples
Band 5

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

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In
this
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twenty-first
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twenty
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twenty-first
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first
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 century, a lot of countries are packed with a large number of
youngsters
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 compared to elderly people. There are some arguments whether
this
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 could be an advantage for the
country
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 or not.
Therefore
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, I will explain some of the benefits of
this
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 case. The population of a
country
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 with numerous young
adults
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 serve some advantages. Since
youngsters
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 tend to have more energy than older people so they do not easily get tired during their work.
This
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 extra energy can be used for a good movement
such
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 as delivering new ideas and making those ideas become new innovations for their
country
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.
For instance
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,
in
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at
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their
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an
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 early age, young
adults
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 like to challenge themselves out of curiosity. They are eager to learn something new.
As a result
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,
youngsters
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 can help elder people to give them fresh opinions
for
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on
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 the latest issues.
Secondly
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, in
this
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 modern era,
the
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apply
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advance
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advanced
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 technology can
also
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 help
youngsters
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 to implement their ideas.
Furthermore
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, free resources
such
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 as
journal
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journals
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 and study papers are available to elevate their concepts.
For example
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, they can make a new tool to recycle the excess amount of plastic and turn it into cone
block
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blocks
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 or as
base
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the base
a base
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 material
of
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for
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 pavements.
Moreover
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,
this
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 can reduce the waste of plastic from our environment. In
this
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 condition, we know that
youngsters
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 can make a high contribution to their
country
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.
On the other hand
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, the rising number of young
adults
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 can be a difficult issue to be solved. Due to the increasing population, the demand for job vacancies has
also
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 risen. The competition to get the position is quite high.
For example
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, if these young
adults
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 do not get proper training or a significant job, the crime rate in the
country
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 will be rising. The other is if they have already got a job, nowadays,
youngsters
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 tend to have a low loyalty to their company as they will search for a better option for their career. Overall, the high population of
youngsters
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 in some countries might have some disadvantages but, I believe there are a lot of benefits that we can earn from the young
adults
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 if the government knows how to treat them well.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • demographic
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • innovation
  • skilled labor
  • social development
  • technology
  • dividend
  • competition
  • resources
  • social welfare
  • unrest
  • instability
  • healthcare
  • elderly care
What to do next:
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