Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
As
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

show examples
industrialization
development
Replace the word
develops

The word development doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
, it looks like
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can make different decisions on their career,
Correct your spelling
lifestyles

The word life styles seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

show examples
life styles
Correct your spelling
lifestyles

The word life styles seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

show examples
or nutrition products. While there are
variety
Add an article
a variety

The noun phrase variety seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
of
choices
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to choose
, I
Change preposition
from, I

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
believe it only suits
for
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
a small
amount
Change the quantifier
number

It appears that the quantifier a small amount does not fit with the countable noun people. Consider changing the quantifier or the noun.

show examples
of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and we need to make
choices
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

more sensible based on
individual
Add an article
the individual

The noun phrase individual situation seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations

It seems that situation may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
. There will be a narrow
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
selections
Fix the agreement mistake
selection

It seems that selections may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
when
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

make up their minds depends on their own situation
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that the comma after such as is unnecessary. Consider removing it.

show examples
financial level, personal skills, and abilities.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

there are plenty of job vacancies, many
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

still find
hard
Correct pronoun usage
it hard

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
to look for a job.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, after I considered the working experiences and strengths I have got, there
is
Change the verb form
are

The singular verb form is does not seem to agree with the plural subject much choices for me at the job market. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
not
much
Change the quantifier
many

It appears that the quantifier much does not fit with the countable noun choices. Consider changing the quantifier or the noun.

show examples
choices
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for me
at
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the job market.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, we need to have a clear mind when we purchase the
stuffs
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff

It appears that stuffs is an uncountable noun and should not be made plural. Consider changing the noun.

show examples
to avoid unnecessary cost.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, when I decided to buy a car, I will make up my mind to focus on its make and mileage
in
Change preposition
at

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
a reasonable price before I go to the markets.
Otherwise
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, you will get lost by large amounts of manufactures and make a regret decision. In conclusion, it is good to have different
choices
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

nowadays. While I believe it is important to make a clever decision regards to our own situation.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
What to do next:
Look at other essays: