IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Smoking should be banned in public places because it not only harms the smokers, but also those who are nearby. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#places #smokers
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Today smoking activities are prohibited in public areas in order to prevent non-
smokers
Use synonyms
 from
smoke
Use synonyms
 exposure. I definitely agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because it will lead to a number of
health
Use synonyms
 issues for both
smokers
Use synonyms
 and
second
Linking Words
-hand
smokers
Use synonyms
. The
first
Linking Words
 reason why I agree with the prohibition of smoking in public places is that smoking is not good for
smokers
Use synonyms
’ well-being. they might get unhealthy on their body cavity,
such
Linking Words
 as liver,
heart
Use synonyms
, lungs, etc. Your body will be broken and diseases will come up and harm you;
for example
Linking Words
, my father is a
smoker
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 and after smoking for 20 years he got sick on his lungs and he often could not breathe normally today, after he checked
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 a doctor, a doctor said that there is some bad effect of his smoking habit. and if he wants to get healthier, he must get
heart
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 surgery to put three rings on his
heart
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 vessels. Aside from leading to
health
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 issues for
smokers
Use synonyms
,
smoke
Use synonyms
 exposure will trigger a number of
health
Use synonyms
 problems for passive
smokers
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. Passive
smokers
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 always breathe
smoke
Use synonyms
 without smoking, some research said that passive
smokers
Use synonyms
 could get bigger damage than
smokers
Use synonyms
 that happened because
smoke
Use synonyms
 is a trigger for passive
smokers
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 to get bad risks,
such
Linking Words
 as lungs cancer,
heart
Use synonyms
 coroner,
heart
Use synonyms
 disease, stroke, and others;
for example
Linking Words
, my friend on a college is a passive
smoker
Use synonyms
 who often hangs out with his
smoker
Use synonyms
 friends. After 3 years always becomes a passive
smoker
Use synonyms
 for a period and often, he can’t breathe normally like before. According to that issue, he had a verdict to has lung cancer and must get surgery immediately. To conclude, I personally agree with the statement saying that
smokers
Use synonyms
 should be prohibited in public areas because it will trigger some
health
Use synonyms
 problems for the
smokers
Use synonyms
 themselves and the passive
smokers
Use synonyms
,
for example
Linking Words
, lung cancer,
heart
Use synonyms
 coroner,
heart
Use synonyms
 disease, stroke, and others because of the bad impact from smokes.
Submitted by auzanghiffari on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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