IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people argue that it is more important to have an enjoyable job than to earn a lot of money. Others disagree and think that a good salary leads to a better life.

#people #job #money #salary #life
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Nowadays, most communities go to college and university to study a field they might like in order to have a good and enjoyable stint.
However
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,
money
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 is still an important factor in
job
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 selection, and several people argue that earning a salary is more important than enjoyable work. On the one hand, it is true that in a way,
money
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 leads to better
life
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 quality. With more
money
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 we can,
for instance
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, consume more, buy good quality products, go on holidays and do numerous activities. All these things contribute to a more enjoyable
life
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. Even though the
job
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 we do does not completely satisfy us, all the other moments apart from our task time will be filled with exciting things. The purpose is to reach well-being and to some ,extent happiness and
money
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 is a way to do it.
On the other hand
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,
although
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money
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 is a way to reach happiness, it may be not enough. It is not by chance that nowadays people are seeking a
job
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 that fit their interests. It is a tendency that increases more and more in western countries.
For example
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, universities provide a wider range of topics and programs every year in order to answer the question that every young wonder: "What do I want to do in my
life
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?" In some cases, some decide to quit their
job
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, even well paid, because they evolve in an environment they do not like.
This
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 is well the proof that
money
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 cannot satisfy all our needs. In conclusion, I personally think that even though payment can help to have a better
life
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, it cannot completely lead to happiness. We spend the major part of our
life
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 at work and people are more and more aware that
this
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 part has to be enjoyable.
Submitted by lovejawanda.0001 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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