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Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #parents #children #members #society #school #place
As a matter of fact that
children
 play a crucial role in the prosperity of a country.
Hence
, how to educate them to become useful staff is not only really a great mission of teachers but
also
parents
. From my perspective, I am completely convinced by
this
 idea for some reasons mentioned in
this
 essay. On the one hand, it is obvious that
parents
 keep a
principle
Correct your spelling
principal
show examples
 responsibility to guide their
children
all
Change preposition
in all
show examples
 things from gaining
knowledge
 and social skills to treat generously with others.
Furthermore
,
children
 are certainly and mostly affected by their
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
show examples
environment
Change the noun form
environments
show examples
such
 as
Correct your spelling
lifestyles
show examples
life styles
Correct your spelling
lifestyles
show examples
 and their
knowledge
.
Hence
, it is
undeneable
Correct your spelling
undeniable
 that the child achievements always have the
Correct your spelling
biggest
bigest
Change the word
biggest
show examples
 contributions of their family.
In addition
, no matter how it happens all
parents
 really want to do
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
 things for their boys and girls. Because of that reasons we always believe that
children
 surely receive the best education from their family to become helpful persons for our society.
On the other hand
,
although
 we know clearly about the importance of family with our
children
but
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apply
show examples
we can not assume all teaching for them due to there
are
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is
show examples
 a lot of
knowledge
 and social skills they have to learn from the teachers.
Such
 as our generation said: without
school
 or without
Add an article
a teacher
show examples
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
, no one can be successful.
Thus
,
school
 is really
a
Change the article
an
show examples
actractive
Correct your spelling
attractive
 spot where is not only for
children
 expanding their
knowledge
 but
also
 for them interacting with their friends and saving wonderful students memories. Through community
activities
Add a comma
,activities
show examples
children
 in
school
 can help them have more experiences which competently communicate with people and become more confident after graduating. In conclusion,
children
 are totally like rising generations for our national development become strong and consistent
compare
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comparison
show examples
 with other countries. For that
reasons
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reason
show examples
, having appropriate schedules to educate them
more
Add a missing verb
is more
show examples
 and more beneficial for our community that
were
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was
show examples
 completely responsible for both family and
school
 to evolve
this
 operation.
Submitted by Lisa on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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