Do you agree or disagree that celebrities are paid far too much money?
Most
people
think that superstars are paid too much then
general job holders. I will discuss Correct your spelling
than
about
it, and give my view.
Remove the preposition
apply
Firstly
, Famous personalities have high
pay scale Correct word choice
a higher
then
government and private job holders. It is because they are surrounded by Replace the word
than
people
everywhere and often told that they donot
have Correct your spelling
do not
private
life. But I think they should not be paid Add an article
a private
such
massive
amount. More than celebrities, government workers are most important, because they serve Correct article usage
a massive
to
the nation. Change preposition
apply
This employees
will eventually have more stress than a film Change the determiner
This employee
These employees
start
or any well-known personalities. Correct your spelling
star
For example
, Police officer
have much more stressful Fix the agreement mistake
officers
day
when compared to Fix the agreement mistake
days
the
superstars or Correct article usage
apply
film makers
. As the Correct your spelling
film-makers
officer
responsibility is Change noun form
officer's
also
to protect this
celebrates
.
Replace the word
celebration
Secondly
, Dispite
Correct your spelling
despite
of
having Change preposition
apply
such
huge
amount, some stars will waste that money only for their lavish being but they Correct article usage
a huge
donot
help poor Correct your spelling
do not
people
. They also
do add promotions in which they will get lot
of money. Change the article
a lot
While
a direct impact will be on our country with government employees. So they are the one
who should be benefited Correct pronoun usage
ones
first,
than
Replace the word
then
teacher
who are strong pillars of student's education. Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
This
Change the determiner
This person
These people
people
should have main
priority. Correct article usage
the main
For example
, without a teacher their
Replace the word
there
is
no Correct subject-verb agreement
are
achivements
and development in the country, Correct your spelling
achievements
achievement
wheras
with film stars there is no difference Correct your spelling
whereas
whether
they are present or not.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that Change preposition
in whether
celebrites
are paid too much. it appears to me that it is totally absurd to pay enormous salaries for personalities whose jobs do not improve our quality of life on a daily basis.Correct your spelling
celebrities
Submitted by tassajay93 on
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task response
Your introduction lacks a clear opinion statement. Make sure to clearly present your opinion on whether you agree or disagree with the given statement
coherence cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Make sure to include a clear introduction that presents the topic and your opinion, and a conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your opinion