When asked to choose between a life without work and working most of the time, people would always choose not to work. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion.

People
spend most of their time working as it is the only option for survival in
this
world. There are perspectives when asking
people
whether they choose between having a
work
-free
life
or getting a job. So it is possible in a case that they will decide to have no
work
. In my opinion, having a job is more beneficial than without working.
To begin
with, the job allows persons to find colleagues who have similar interests leading enables them to socialize, build contacts and find support. The reason behind
this
is humans need communication with others
due to
social animals. Increasing relations within groups
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
the bond between
people
stronger, and
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
each other in unusual situations especially colleagues’ contacts.
As a result
, without
work
Add a comma
work,
show examples
social skills will not
occur
Verb problem
improve
show examples
, and be hard to participate with others.
Moreover
, jobs provide income to support expenditure because money influences the quality of
life
. Humans have to buy basic needs
such
as food.
Besides
, they use a significant of money to deal with issues to pass
life
smoothly.
In other words
, if
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
do not do any tasks and choose to relax all time, they face financial predicaments. One of them stops working,
then
the others will follow
this
action.
Consequently
, without doing jobs will
be
Verb problem
have
show examples
a negative effect on the well-being of the community as a whole citizen. In conclusion,
although
working most of the time keeps
people
busy, it challenges
and
Correct pronoun usage
them and
show examples
gives
means
Correct pronoun usage
them means
show examples
to develop themselves. They will make progress
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their knowledge and improve
life
to meet other
people
depending on
experiences
Correct pronoun usage
their experiences
show examples
in their
work
. So every person eventually chooses to
work
to receive
profits
Correct article usage
the profits
show examples
of their
life
.
Submitted by noprada23 on

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task response
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your position on the topic and provides an outline of the main points that will be discussed in the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Work on creating stronger transitions between your ideas and paragraphs to improve the flow of your essay. Also, make sure to have a clearer conclusion that summarizes the main points.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial stability
  • personal interests
  • social isolation
  • structured daily routine
  • sense of purpose
  • achievement
  • boredom
  • overworking
  • burnout
  • hobbies
  • family time
  • work pressures
  • stress
  • health issues
  • social interactions
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