Young people today spend too much money and time following fashion trends (clothing, tech) .To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #money #time #fashion #trends #tech

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Over the past few decades, there has been a paradigm shift in the decision making of the younger generation. With technology advancement and other social media applications , they are getting wrongly influenced by high society glamour and end up spending time and money to be like them. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss how fashion trends are influencing our youth which is not constructive for their future. Notwithstanding , youth should have a

lazor

Correct your spelling

razor

-sharp focus on their studies to secure

a better jobs

Correct the article-noun agreement

better jobs

a better job

show examples

and earn well. While they can always have some time to unwinding and rejuvenate themselves by engaging in music and other fun activities. But unfortunately, teenagers prefer to

hooked

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hook

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onto celebrities ,

for example

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k-pop

Change preposition

in k-pop

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most of the girls follows them on social media and

also

Linking Words

spend hours following their lifestyle and fashion. They find their life so fascinating and feels that studies are not so important and start imagining life like them Another issue is there are so many hi-tech gadgets available in the market which they may not need but looking at misleading ads kids get attracted towards it and force their parents to buy it. They can

also

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go to the extent of using

thier

Correct your spelling

their

pocket money to acquire it. In a nutshell, I believe we should provide an inducive environment and proper guidance to teenagers in helping them to make

a better and wiser decisions

Correct the article-noun agreement

better and wiser decisions

a better and wiser decision

show examples

when it comes to buying only what is useful for them. ,

Also

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they should remain focus on creating a strong foundation for their career.

Submitted by umapati.social on Wed Sep 01 2021

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

self-expression
peer pressure
social media influence
financial stability
fast fashion
consumerism
social validation
fear of missing out (FOMO)
cultural shifts
marketing strategies
environmental sustainability
thrift shopping
do-it-yourself (DIY)
economic impact
sustainable practices
upcycling

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Young people today spend too much money and time following fashion trends (clothing, tech) .To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

You recently purchased a product that turned out to be faulty. Write a letter to the store manager, complaining about the issue and requesting a replacement or refund.

Some people think that the development of technology has made our life more complex, and the solution is to live a simpler life without technology. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that people who choose a job early and keep doing it are more likely to get a satisfying career life than those who frequently change jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

"Air pollution in major cities is a significant issue. What are some potential causes of this problem, and what strategies can be implemented to tackle it?"