Many people are now working from home every day instead of travelling to the office What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this for workers and employers? Discuss your ideas and support them with reasons and examples

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It's certainly true that a big sector of the population prefers to
work
from their houses than
work
onsite
.
However
, not all the effects of
this
innovation have been positive,
although
, there are certainly some advantages. There are several drawbacks to working from
home
rather than going to the
onsite
office. A common criticism of online
jobs
is that sitting in one place for the whole day will lead you to feel bored as you stay in the same room alone without meeting your friends,
furthermore
, the employee feels tired as he sits in the same place without moving,
for instance
, during COVID-19 a survey for UAE teachers has been conducted and the results made a shock as most of them feel sleepy during online classes. another negative aspect is that most online
jobs
provide a lower salary than
onsite
jobs
,
for example
, many companies during COVID-19 deduct a part from employee's salaries regarding working from their homes. In spite of these negatives, working from
home
has brought many benefits as well. One
such
advantage is that online
jobs
save time more than
onsite
jobs
,
moreover
, the employee who works online has more time to spend with his family than those who
work
onsite
as they will not drive to
work
. Another advantage is that online
jobs
will save
money
as you will not spend
money
on transportation,
furthermore
, employees can eat inside their homes, which will not only lead to saving
money
only, but to becoming healthier as well. In conclusion,
while
there are obvious drawbacks to working from
home
, there are some advantages. I prefer to
work
from
home
so I can spend more time with my family and save
money
.
Submitted by waleed.edu11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, but there are areas that can be made clearer. Both the introduction and conclusion are present and adequately summarize the main points. You might consider connecting your ideas more fluidly between paragraphs and within them to enhance coherence.
task achievement
You've provided a complete response to the task, covering both advantages and disadvantages. However, your ideas could be expressed more clearly and could be better supported with relevant, specific examples. Try to expand on your points with more detailed explanations or additional examples.
coherence cohesion
Good that you have both an introduction and a conclusion, summarizing the points effectively.
task achievement
You've addressed both sides of the issue, discussing both advantages and disadvantages of working from home.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: