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Band 6

Many elderly people are no long looked after by their families but are put in care homes or nursing homes. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

#people #families #care #homes #trend
Nowadays, there are numerous care
homes
 or nursing
homes
 available for old
age
 people owing to
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
 of care and support by their family members. In
this
 essay, I will discuss both positive and negative aspects associated with
this
 trend with
relevent
Correct your spelling
relevant
 examples.
To begin
 with, the
first
 and most important pros of sending old
age
persons
 to old folk
homes
 are providing better health facilities. As
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 there are professionally trained staff to look after the senior
persons
.
In addition
, these
homes
also
 provide ample
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
services to senior citizens
such
 as lift or elevate so that they can live comfortably. On
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
top of
this
, there are
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of old
persons
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the same
age
 which helps to make
friendly
Add an article
a friendly
show examples
 environment.
As a result
, it
also
 helps to reduce stress and anxiety in old
age
persons
.
On the other hand
, the upsides of
this
 trajectory, the drawback cannot be undermined. The main con of
this
 trend is
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
 of emotional attachment by individuals. Elderly people do not
heartly
Correct your spelling
heartily
 touch
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each other because they love and strong bonding only with their sons and daughters.
Moreover
, they
also
Add a missing verb
are also
show examples
 depressed because they do not look
their
Change preposition
at their
show examples
 grand
Correct your spelling
children
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
 and all their family. So, it will affect their physical and mental health.
For instance
, studies
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
 that 90% of elders are
more happy
Replace the words
happier
show examples
when they live
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
 own home with family. In conclusion, it can be
deducted
Correct your spelling
deduced
show examples
 that despite the benefits of elderly staying in
take
Change the verb form
taking
show examples
 care
homes
 it can
also
 lead to depression which could result
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 mental illness.
Submitted by shwetaverma30722 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Professional care
  • Medical attention
  • Trained staff
  • Social interaction
  • Combat loneliness
  • Safety and security
  • Relief for families
  • Loss of autonomy
  • Emotional impact
  • Cost
  • Financial strain
  • Quality of care
  • Neglect and abuse
  • Detachment from family
  • Mental wellbeing
What to do next:
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