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Band 4.5

Unmanned vehicles will become more and more popular in the future. Passengers travelling inside these robot cars will be only human. Do you think the benefits of these surpass the drawbacks? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#vehicles #future #passengers #robot #cars #surpass
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In
this
 ever-changing world,
technology
 has become a vital part
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 human life, especially
transportation
,
as a result
, unmanned
vehicles
 appeared and become more and more important in the future. Some
people
 said them to be
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
benefits
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
 than normal
vehicles
.
However
, my opinion is completely odd with
this
, I believe unmanned means of transport still bring us several
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
advantages.
First
, a plethora of companies
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 use
unmanned
Add an article
the unmanned
an unmanned
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mean
Fix the agreement mistake
means
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 of transport
are
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is
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 able to save millions when
change
Change the verb form
changing
show examples
 ordinary
vehicles
 into unmanned one. The industry of
transportation
 will break the ground by replacing a big amount of normal
transportation
 which
also
 mean the new changes from the
transportation
 companies. They will no longer hire
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
drivers meanwhile the robots will do that.
These
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
 does not only save money but
also
 attract many customers who want to try the new
technology
.
As a result
, the economics of a country will have
an
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apply
show examples
incredible growth.
Secondly
, the
changing
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change
show examples
 in
transportation
 may help to improve the environment. When
whole
Add an article
the whole
show examples
of
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apply
show examples
transportation
 system
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
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, a lot of other things will
be change
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be changed
be changing
show examples
 either.
For example
, those items of ordinary cars will no longer
produced
Change the verb form
be produced
show examples
 and
people
 are forced to use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unmanned
vehicles
,
however
, those
vehicles
 have a higher price and it is hard for everyone to afford that. For that reason, they may have to use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
transportation
instead
 which will help to reduce
the
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apply
show examples
air pollution and help our environment to be better.
Finally
,
vehicles
 without human control may help to reduce the death and injured index. When
technology
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
 control of
the
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apply
show examples
vehicles
, it will increase
the
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apply
show examples
insurance and protect us from the
dangerous
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dangers
show examples
.
For example
,
people
 may experience car accidents due to drinking alcohol while driving or
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lost control of speed,
instead
,
technology
 helps us to avoid all of those situations and assure us to be safe.
However
, the
changing
Replace the word
changes
show examples
 in
system
Add an article
the system
a system
show examples
 of
transportation
 still exist several drawbacks which can not avoid. As drivers are replaced by robots, they will be unemployed and be unable to raise
family
Correct article usage
a family
show examples
, afford the taxes or fees. It will lead to more and more
people
 who
poor
Add a missing verb
are poor
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 and homeless, which affect negatively to the society of a country. In
conclude
Replace the word
conclusion
show examples
, I want to emphasize the benefits of unmanned transportations
also
 there may still exist
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
disadvantages.
Submitted by doibichhoa on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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