Shopping online has various advantages for consumers but it may also have several disadvantages including the loss of individual privacy. Do the advantages of online shopping for consumers outweigh the disadvantages?

#consumers #loss #privacy

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In various nations around the world, many

people

Use synonyms

are doing online shopping as

this

Linking Words

ease

Correct subject-verb agreement

eases

show examples

their life in so many aspects.

However

Linking Words

, there is a small group of

people

Use synonyms

who dislike it.

While

Linking Words

there is clearly a drawback to

this

Linking Words

, I personally believe that the benefits are more significant. The disadvantage of online shopping is the loss of individual privacy.

That is

Linking Words

to say, we need to register an account in order to proceed with the order.

Moreover

Linking Words

, we need to key in our bank details for the payment. So, certain

people

Use synonyms

think that

this

Linking Words

is not secure

due to

Linking Words

the high rates of scammer recently around the world.

As a result

Linking Words

, they prefer to down to the shop for shopping purposes.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, one of the major pros is that online shopping saves

people

Use synonyms

time

especially

Add the comma(s)

, especially

show examples

for those who work in the office.

This

Linking Words

is because these categories of

people

Use synonyms

spent

Wrong verb form

spend

show examples

almost 10 hours in the office and to get

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

groceries by going down to the shops is an inconvenience to them.

As a result

Linking Words

, online shopping will be the priority and smart choice for them.

Moreover

Linking Words

, online shopping provides a variety of choices for consumers to purchase their goods.

For example

Linking Words

, there are thousands of companies that do online business around the world.

As a result

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, consumers will have a better choice in order to purchase the items in a short period.

In addition

Linking Words

, online shopping

also

Linking Words

helps the public to save costs in transportation and parking

fees

Use synonyms

. Take Singapore country as an example, parking

fees

Use synonyms

in the shopping

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

expansive

Correct word choice

expensive

show examples

and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

transportation

fees

Use synonyms

have been increased recently. So, by

purchase

Wrong verb form

purchasing

show examples

things online, the customers only need to pay for the delivery

fees

Use synonyms

thus

Linking Words

for the middle wages

people

Use synonyms

will be benefited from these services.

To sum up

Linking Words

Change the capitalization

show examples

believe the pros are of greater significance than the cons.

Although

Linking Words

the consumer needs to disclose their bank details, they will gain a lot of benefits when they are doing online shopping. Given

this

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, it is recommended that the public should practice online shopping as compared to the old method.

Submitted by tehmaylean on Sun Sep 05 2021

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task response

Task Response: The essay partly addresses the task but lacks depth and thorough analysis. It briefly introduces the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping without expanding on each point or developing ideas fully. A more comprehensive discussion of the advantages and disadvantages, with clear examples and analysis, is needed to fully address the task.

coherence and cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the essay lacks proper development and support for the main points. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of online shopping, with clear topic sentences and supporting details. Additionally, smoother transitions between ideas and better use of cohesive devices are needed to improve coherence and cohesion.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

355 words

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Shopping online has various advantages for consumers but it may also have several disadvantages including the loss of individual privacy. Do the advantages of online shopping for consumers outweigh the disadvantages?

The internet has changed the way we communicate. Much communication today happens through social media. Some people support this and think it is a positive development. Others believe that social media have negative effects. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

More and more people around the world are learning English as a second or foreign language, even in countries where it is not used in daily life. What are the advantages and disadvantages to this?

Computers and AI technology ae increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

In modern society, fashion is becoming more and more popular in people’s choice of clothes. Why? Do you think it is positive development or negative development?

With the rise of e-books comes the decline in paper books. Some people think that it is a good speed forward, while others do not. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?