Shopping online has various advantages for consumers but it may also have several disadvantages including the loss of individual privacy. Do the advantages of online shopping for consumers outweigh the disadvantages?

#consumers #loss #privacy

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In various nations around the world, many

people

Use synonyms

are doing online shopping rather than

shop

Wrong verb form

shopping

show examples

. Some of the consumers think that it is extremely efficient for them

whereas

Linking Words

others are not. It is undeniable that online shopping gives

people

Use synonyms

a great number of cons,

Linking Words

nevertheless

Add a comma

nevertheless,

show examples

there are some drawbacks to it. I personally believe that the benefits are more significant. The disadvantage of online shopping is

the

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

customers tend to lose individual privacy.

This

Linking Words

is because we need to create an account and disclose our bank details for the company in order for shipment and payment.

For instance

Linking Words

Correct word choice

if we

show examples

have to sign up for an account in the Shopee

apps

Fix the agreement mistake

app

show examples

then

Linking Words

only we can proceed with our purchase.

As a result

Linking Words

, certain

people

Use synonyms

think that

this

Linking Words

is insecure

due to

Linking Words

there is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

high rate of online scammers

recently

Rephrase

apply

show examples

around the world.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, one of the major merits is online shopping can help consumers reduce expenses ,especially in transportation and parking fees. Take Singapore as an example, parking fees in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

shopping malls are expensive and there

Wrong verb form

has been

show examples

an increase in transportation fares recently. So, by

purchase

Wrong verb form

purchasing

show examples

things from the websites, they can absolutely save the costs and they only need to pay for the delivery fee.

Moreover

Linking Words

, online shopping is tremendously convenient for

people

Use synonyms

nowadays. We can see that the majority of employees have spent half of the day at work, so

there

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

hardly have spare time to go to the shop to top up the groceries,

thus

Linking Words

online shopping will be their priority and wise choice.

Consequently

Linking Words

, they manage to complete two tasks at one time.

To sum up

Linking Words

, I believe the merits are of greater significance than the demerit.

Although

Linking Words

we need to disclose our privacy to the website, online shopping will definitely help

people

Use synonyms

in saving

Wrong verb form

save

show examples

costs and brings them convenience in their daily life. Given

this

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, it is recommended that the public should start to practice shopping online as compared to the old method of shopping.

Submitted by tehmaylean on Mon Sep 06 2021

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task response

Address the advantages and disadvantages in more detail and provide more balanced argumentation.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that the essay has a clear logical structure with a more effective introduction and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

334 words

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Shopping online has various advantages for consumers but it may also have several disadvantages including the loss of individual privacy. Do the advantages of online shopping for consumers outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Many people choose to travel abroad to learn a foreign language instead of studying in their home town . What are the advantages and disadvantages of this ?

Some cities create housing areas by providing taller buildings. Others create housing by building houses on a wider area of land. What solution is better?

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages.If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and if so, how?

In some countries, an increasing number of children are overweight or obese as a result of eating too much fast food. Banning fast food from school canteens is the best way to fight this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that teenagers should study all school subjects. Others argue that they should focus on only the subjects that they are good at or find most interesting. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.