People aim to achieve balance between work and other activities of their lives,but few are able to do this. Suggest problems in balancing and some solution for over- coming such problems.

#people #aim #balance #work #activities #lives #over-

People

wish to maintain both their personal and professional

life

well.

However

, it is not easy for everyone to achieve

work-

Correct article usage

a work-life

show examples

life

balance

in our

life

. The main reason is that most

people

have poor

time

management

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

and a

visable

Correct your spelling

viable

visible

solution is

Correct your spelling

top

show examples

priority

Replace the word

prioritize

show examples

our daily

activities

and plan

everyday's

Replace the word

every day's

show examples

schedules wisely. Most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

people

Add an article

the people

show examples

do not know how to use their

time

effectively. It is very often that most

people

would love to reach

work-

Correct article usage

a work-life

show examples

life

balance

in their

life

However

, due to

work

or other commitments,

people

do not have their spare

time

to enjoy their lives other than

work

. Recent studies have been done by

University

Correct article usage

the University

show examples

of South Australia about how effectively working

people

have to manage their

time

properly, they have interviewed around 500

people

and 70% of the interviewers confirmed that they

work

extra hours, sleep less than 7 hours and no social

life

This

is a good example to show that

people

do not have

work

life

balance

can be caused by poor

management

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

. Very

smiliar

Correct your spelling

similar

studies have

also

been done by Canada, they have

trageted

Correct your spelling

targeted

10 busy couples to join a month studies by reviewing their daily

activities

and

then

helped them to plan and prioritise their daily tasks. The result has successfully proved that each of the

couple

Change to a plural noun

couples

show examples

has significantly improved their social

life

and they feel happier of their

life

than before. In conclusion, poor

time

management

skill is a major problem for

people

who are not able to

balance

between their

work

and other

activities

. Social

activities

can be improved by having a good plan and good

time

management

Submitted by Special Queen on Wed Sep 08 2021

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People aim to achieve balance between work and other activities of their lives,but few are able to do this. Suggest problems in balancing and some solution for over- coming such problems.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that e-books are the death of paper books while others think that paper books will never disappear? -Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

These days internet-based courses have become a popular alternative to university-based courses. Some students prefer this type of learning because they do not need to attend lectures. Others argue that it is important to study at university. Discuss both sides of the views and give your opinion.

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skill and imagination than reading. To what extent do you agree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.