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Writing Samples
Band 5

New Technology and ways of buying and selling are transforming the lives of consumers. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#technology #lives #consumers
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Over the past decades, it has been observed that technology has great impacts on the ways of buying and selling. While some aged
people
Use synonyms
 prefer traditional shopping ways, I firmly believe that technological advancement leads to purchasing alternatives. To commence the reason,
first
Linking Words
 and foremost is that it is of utmost convenience to online shopping. Purchasing activities, including smartphones and other electronic devices along with the Internet, have turned out to be a new form.
For example
Linking Words
, customers are able to place orders on some e-commerce portals
such
Linking Words
 as Amazon and
Ebay
Correct your spelling
eBay
 and those purchased items can be delivered to their home addresses without putting any
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
 to visit stores physically.
Moreover
Linking Words
, a variety of goods, including food, electronic appliances, clothes are all available online nowadays, that meets all the demands of customers
such
Linking Words
 as price, brand and preference. Meanwhile,
people
Use synonyms
 can save enormous amounts of time by shopping online
instead
Linking Words
 of commuting to stores on the road.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
merchants's
Remove the s
merchants'
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 products can be targeted to a large group of
people
Use synonyms
 than in-store shopping. To be more specific,
as
Change preposition
with
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 the development of
global
Correct article usage
the global
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 deployment of
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
 and
high
Correct article usage
the high
show examples
 efficiency of shipping systems, distance is no longer a barrier. Sellers can simply market their products through search engines like Google and all the
people
Use synonyms
 in the world who can access the network will be potential clients.
As a result
Linking Words
, selling online can easily boost sales. That being said, we cannot deny that many old folks still find
themselves
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 more enjoyable to go to traditional stores.
That is
Linking Words
 attributed to the fact that interacting with sellers has instilled in their buying
behavi
Correct your spelling
behaviour
Submitted by vincentchenyj on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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