These days many children spend a lot of their time playing computer games but little time doing sports. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Nowadays, with the
effect
of advancement in technology ,youngsters have replaced their habits of participating in sports activity by indulging
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
computer games. The main reason for
this
approach is
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
of availability of playgrounds and
thus
this
trend imposes a detrimental
effect
on
child's
Correct article usage
a child's
show examples
physical and psychological development.
To begin
with, it is been observed that
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of playgrounds for youngsters and adults are
detoriorating
Correct your spelling
deteriorating
.
This
is because, with the increase in population and urbanisation ,much space is being occupied for residential and commercial
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
.
As a result
, cities and towns are becoming concrete jungles which
does
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do
show examples
not encourage outdoor activities to take place. To exemplify, the recent survey by the Times Now showed that
Gurugram
Correct article usage
the Gurugram
show examples
population has upsurged in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
5 years to 50 % which led to cutting on playgrounds and parks.
Furthermore
,
this
increased trend of prolonged use of computer technology games is encouraging a negative
effect
on the development of
childs
Correct your spelling
child's
child
physical and mental health.
This
is to say that, the youngsters are leading more of a sedentary lifestyle than ever before.
Moreover
,
lack
of physical sports is leading to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of
excersize
Correct your spelling
exercise
and body fitness. Another important factor is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
continous
Correct your spelling
continuous
staring on screens is leading to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
mental instability and weak eyesight. To illustrate, the current survey done by one health NGO showed that there is an increase in more than 60 % of young people who are facing problems of obesity in recent times. To conclude, it is true that
continous
Correct your spelling
continuous
use of computer screens is having an obstructive
effect
on adult's and
childern's
Correct your spelling
children's
physical and mental health and the main reason contributing to
this
,is
lack
of space for them to play outdoor games.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • allure
  • captivate
  • supervise
  • accessible
  • scarcity
  • safer alternative
  • peer pressure
  • educational tools
  • cognitive skills
  • implications
  • obesity
  • poor posture
  • hand-eye coordination
  • problem-solving abilities
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