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Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays many students go traveling or working for a year after graduating from high school and before starting university. Are there more advantages or disadvantages to this trend?

#students #year #school #university #trend
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A growing number of
students
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 choose to either travel or work for a year in recent times before starting their journey at a
university
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.
However
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, it may not directly provide skills for your future career, so is
this
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 beneficial? In my opinion, no.
To begin
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 with, working before studying might give the young ones experience, which could be used later on in life. Travelling can expose
students
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 to various cultures around the world, improve their communication skills, and become more independent. Working can help young people build confidence and even save money for
university
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 expenses. These experiences can contribute to their personal and professional growth, making them ready
to begin
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 their academic journey.
However
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, there are significant disadvantages to
this
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 trend. Taking a gap year may disrupt
students
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’ academic progress, making it harder to face the challenges of
university
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 life.
Additionally
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, some
students
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 struggle with time management if they continue working
while
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 studying, which can affect their academic performance.
For example
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, I have a friend who worked before starting
university
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 and later found it difficult to balance work and studies, leading to unexpected results.
While
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 travelling could be a fun experience, it can be costly for
students
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.
To conclude
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,
while
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 taking a gap for a year after high school can offer personal growth and experiences, there are more disadvantages than advantages,
such
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 as academic disruptions,
time
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and time
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 management issues, and can be costly.
Submitted by nihat.suleyman08 on

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task achievement
Ensure the balance between advantages and disadvantages is thoroughly explored to strengthen the argument.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to illustrate your points more vividly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure paragraph transitions are seamless to maintain a better flow of ideas.
introduction conclusion present
Strong introduction that clearly states the main argument.
logical structure
Each paragraph focuses on a clear main point, supporting the structure of the essay.
supported main points
Good use of personal example to illustrate a point.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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