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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that women should play an equal role in the military and police force. Others, however, think that women are not suitable for this kind of work. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

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It is believed by some, that
women
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 should have an equal
role
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 in the military and police force,
however
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, others think that
women
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 are not capable of doing
this
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. My opinion is that
,
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apply
show examples
men
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 and
women
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 should play an equal
role
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 in
this
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. People believed that
women
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 are not capable physically of doing a military job because they are still holding to our tradition. They believed that
women
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’s responsibility is to take care his husband and look after their children at home.
Moreover
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,
women
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 are having a menstrual period. Most females are experiencing abdominal pain and mood swings because of their monthly period that might affect their emotional features.
However
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, on one side of the argument, there are people who put forward the view that
men
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 and
women
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 should play an equal
role
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 because of technological progress. It helps to provide good training for
men
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 and even
women
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.
Additionally
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, females
such
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 as nurses play an important
role
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 especially when there are injured soldiers.
Furthermore
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,
women
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 are more cautious in making a decision ,unlike
men
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 who are very aggressive during the fight without even thinking more. In conclusion, indeed, that
women
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 should get an equal
role
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 as
men
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 in the military and police force because there are no gender differences between them. To quote an example, there are some schools that are affiliated with
women
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 only but they are now accepting both genders. It is
therefore
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 recommended, that government should give emphasis on
this
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 so that people will accept and understand the equality of
men
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 and
women
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.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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