Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is said that those who have been in prison and are now better people are the most adequate to advise teenagers about the consequences of committing a crime.

This

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essay completely agrees with that statement. I believe that meetings with those who have been imprisoned help them to continue improving their state of mind , and they

also

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give a more realistic point of view to the teenagers. Those who were in confinement and have changed their minds generally benefit from these meetings with teens. Seeing young guys like they were empty of innocence probably makes them think about their mistakes and regret their crimes more.

For instance

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this

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happened to my uncle , Draymond. Three years ago, he was arrested , and he has been 2 years in jail. After that, he could not find a job, so they offered him to give meetings to teens about the consequences of crimes.

This

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made him improve even more , and now he loves his job and is really focused on helping problematic guys.

Also

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, having the experience of someone who has broken the law and has been in prison for that makes the adolescents understand better why they should not get into trouble.

Moreover

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, someone who has felt

this

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horrible background ,

instead

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of someone who has not, makes young people see how horrible it is to be in jail, without their family and friends.

For example

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, in my school, we receive each year people who tell us about drugs, addictions and crimes, and I can identify who has committed a crime and has felt all

this

Linking Words

background and who has not. For sure, it is absolutely better to listen to one's own experience.

To conclude

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, for a high percentage of the population, it is more effective to have those who have recently been in prison and are good citizens talk to the teenager about the dangers of committing a crime because of the advantages for the speaker and for the understanding of the teenagers.

santos_dij

Jun 1, 2023

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content-planning

Your essay shows a clear position and some plan. To raise score, add a brief counter view and explain why you still agree.

coherence

Make each paragraph have one main idea with a clear link to the previous and next part.

language

Use simple, precise words and check for small grammar mistakes to avoid odd sentences.

strength

The writer states a clear view and keeps it while discussing points.

coherence

Ideas connect with some linking words and a steady flow.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

336 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

prisoners
rehabilitation
recidivism
consequences
insights
deterrent
guidance
support
role models
positive change

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Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

More and more business meetings and business training have taken place on the Internet. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

Many people join distance-learning programs (studys material, post, TV, İnternet) and study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the same benefit as attending collages or universities does. Do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on the protection of wild animals and that this money could be better spent on the human population . To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that governments should take a large proportion of people' salaries to pay for public services such as roads and schools. Other thinks high taxes are bad. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some schools and universities, girls tend to choose art (e.g. literature), and boys tend to choose science subjects (e.g. physics). Why do you think this is so? Should this tendency be changed?