Some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as unemployed and homeless.

It is an undeniable fact that in most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
countries
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
of homeless and unemployed
people
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
increasing gradually. it is often argued that the state has
responsibility
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the responsibility
a responsibility
show examples
to take care of
underprivilidged
Correct your spelling
underprivileged
citizens. I think
authorties
Correct your spelling
authorities
should support disadvantaged
people
to bring them to
certain
Add an article
a certain
show examples
level so they can compete
the
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in the
show examples
world.
First
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The first
show examples
reason to support the issue is that in advanced technology most
of
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apply
show examples
humans jobs are occupied by
mechines
Correct your spelling
machines
and labour work is reduced. As per one survey since
last
6 year
Add a hyphen
6-year
show examples
human efforts jobs are reduced to 20% which are
ocupied
Correct your spelling
occupied
by robots or by automation systems. During
this
recession
time
Add a comma
,time
show examples
responsbile
Correct your spelling
responsible
persons should provide opportunities to
young
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the young
show examples
generation for finding jobs hire home.
Furthermore
, another major factor is that recession is
also
a big cause of illegal
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
activity
and attract new generation towards criminal acts.
Governement
Correct your spelling
Government
should prepare some
trainning
Correct your spelling
training
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
where
underprivilidged
Correct your spelling
underprivileged
persons should get
train
Add an article
the train
a train
show examples
and they could start their own
bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
but that skills or they can be able to find a reasonable job in society.
In addition
,
this
act will produce more
skillful
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skilful
show examples
pepole
Correct your spelling
people
in
market
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the market
show examples
who can work more
prfessionally
Correct your spelling
professionally
Furthermore
, The state can prepare shelter homes for needed
people
to live and survive in their difficult time
untill
Correct your spelling
until
they find a suitable job and home for living. To conclude,
Ministory
Correct your spelling
Ministry
should bring some laws to support young
people
for
Add an article
the job
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
and
underprivilidged
Correct your spelling
underprivileged
people
for home.
Submitted by fysl.iqbal on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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