IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people believe that range of technology currently is increasing gap between rich and poor people. Others think that it is causing opposite . Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #range #technology #gap
Few
individuals
 think that nowadays, the range of
technology
 is escalated the gap between rich and poor whereas, others believe it deescalates the apparent difference. Even though both sides have valid points personally, I support the latter group.
This
 essay shall discuss both aspects and try to describe the rationale behind my opinion. The
first
 group of
individuals
 think that the variety of technological advancement increases the difference between people from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high and low economical
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
. The primary reason behind
this
 argument is the poor access of modern inventions to ordinary citizens because of its high cost. Even though the new
technology
 is a dire necessity to society,
individuals
 from low socioeconomic status may not be able to acquire that facility. For
exmple
Correct your spelling
example
, during the Covid pandemic,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of the education system adopted
online
Correct article usage
an online
show examples
 mode of teaching for their students but in remote villages, residents were not able to satisfy the basic needs
such
 as food and shelter, internet school and TV broadcasting lectures were nowhere in the picture.
Therefore
,
this
 difference dramatically pushed the poorly educated crowd to illiteracy.
On the other hand
, some people believe that the new
technology
 has reduced the gap between
poor
Correct article usage
the poor
show examples
 and
rich
Correct article usage
the rich
show examples
. The main rationale behind
this
 thought is
cheap
Correct article usage
the cheap
show examples
 availability of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online facilities.
Moreover
, several
multi national
Correct your spelling
multinational
show examples
 companies are providing services in remote countryside with an affordable and attractive package.
For instance
, Jio was the
first
 internet service provider to villages in India, charging one rupee per day with unlimited data use.
Additionally
, easy access
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
Correct your spelling
android
antroid
Correct article usage
the antroid
show examples
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
 at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 cheap rate started a new normal of equality in the
technology
 between rich and poor. In conclusion, the range of
technology
 shortened the gap between
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals
.
Moreover
, it helps the country to alleviate the economical and social imbalance.
Finally
, it pushes the nation in
Add an article
the forward
a forward
show examples
forward
Change the verb form
forwarding
show examples
 direction.
Submitted by noorshaheen on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: