Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possible, while others think that it should not start until 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is commonly believed that children should start their attendance in
classroom
Correct article usage
the classroom
show examples
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
earlier, while others argue that younger ones should be kept at home or kindergarten
till
Change preposition
in
show examples
timely. I believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
6 or even 5
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
is sufficient to study. The essay will
firstly
look at children's development and after will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
how it is partially harmful. On the one hand, schools gave
an valuable information
Remove the article
valuable information
a piece of valuable information
show examples
, so understanding it as earlier as possible is advantageous. Humankind can develop by themselves, but with
accompanying
Add an article
the accompanying
an accompanying
show examples
teacher and surrounded
pupils
Add a comma
,pupils
show examples
it will be easy.
For instance
, my youngest brother went to school at
5 year-old
Add a hyphen
5-year-old
show examples
, there are differences in understanding and learning processes, He had learned some writing skills, which is impossible for some people at that age.
On the other hand
, childhood should be more entertaining than anything else,
such
as working or especially studying too. Involving beforehand could give some disadvantages for well-being. Some people
exposed
Add a missing verb
are exposed
show examples
to being nervous, while experiencing with
huge
Add an article
a huge
the huge
show examples
amount of information. To sum up, engaging to study earlier can give good results for their future, at the same time may cause health issues for them. I can say that
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
earlier is beneficial for children and it outweighs any drawbacks.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: