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Writing Samples
Band 7

Many people work longer hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities .Does thid situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#people #work #hours #time #leisure #activities #thid #situation
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It is irrefutable that nowadays several individuals work for
a longer intervals
Correct the article-noun agreement
longer intervals
a longer interval
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 of
time
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 and giving less
time
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 to recreational activities. In my perspective ,
this
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 situation has more drawbacks as it affects employee's
health
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 as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
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 to benefits which would be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs. Probably the main negative impact is on employee's
health
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 status. Working for longer hours is responsible for a sedentary lifestyle which inclines to obesity and various medical issues
such
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 as high blood pressure and heart problems. As the worker is stressed and not fitter , ultimately their working
time
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 would be less efficient leading to lower levels of output and service.
Thus
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health
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 is directly proportional to performance at the workplace.
For instance
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, a survey was conducted in 2018 by the world
health
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 organization , which stated that a healthy person has more chances of getting a promotion as compared to an unhealthy one.
Moreover
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, someone has rightly said that a healthy mind stays in a healthy body. Workaholic society has more chances of having stress and depression because their body does not get enough oxygen supply to the brain cells due to the lack of physical exercise.
On the other hand
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, to survive in
this
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 cut-throat competitive world, one has to work really hard to secure their position at the office and fulfil their needs. Working more on skills will assist them to perform better in career . To illustrate, they can get different types of considerable benefits
such
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 as incentives , pay increments by working for some extra
time
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 . In conclusion,
although
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 there are some pros.I still believe that the benefits of
this
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 trend are pale in comparison to the drawbacks as a healthy mind and body are one of the most important things to perform better at tasks
Submitted by Manvir kaur bhatti on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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