IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that bicycles are the best mode of transport in the cities, while others disagree. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of both view and give your opinion.

#people #bicycles #mode #transport #cities
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It is believed that
bicycle
Use synonyms
 is eco-friendly, healthy and cheapest kind of transport.
However
Linking Words
, another part of
people
Use synonyms
 disagrees with
this
Linking Words
 statement.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both arguments in
further
Linking Words
 paragraphs.
First
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 of all,
riding
Add an article
the riding
a riding
show examples
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
 has a
lot
Use synonyms
 of advantages,
such
Linking Words
 as
eco-friendly
Add a missing verb
being eco-friendly
show examples
 and low cost. The metropolises have a
lot
Use synonyms
 of traffic jams and
Use synonyms
Add an article
the problem
a problem
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 with ecology. The
green-house
Correct your spelling
greenhouse
show examples
 effect is
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 dangerous
problem
Use synonyms
 to citizens and
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 will be solved by simple
bicycles
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
bicycles
Use synonyms
 are too cheap. If
people
Use synonyms
 start
Add the particle
to use
show examples
use
Change the form of the verb
using
show examples
 that, they can save
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
amount
money
Change preposition
of money
show examples
.
People
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 are spending a
lot
Use synonyms
 of money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 cars
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because it is including taxes, car fixing and
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
show examples
 of gas.
Also
Linking Words
,
bicycles
Use synonyms
 are important for
people
Use synonyms
 health, especially for
office
Add an article
the office
an office
show examples
 worker, who is sitting a main part of
day
Add an article
the day
a day
show examples
.
Simple
Correct article usage
A simple
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workout
Fix the agreement mistake
workouts
show examples
 can treat and save from obesity and problems with blood circulation.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
other hand
Change the wording
another hand
other hands
show examples
, riding
bicycles
Use synonyms
 is dangerous. If cities have more urbanized roads, the number of road incidents will decrease permanently, but now
bicycle
Use synonyms
 is one of
dangerous
Add an article
a dangerous
show examples
 type of transportation. A lack of cities does not have
infrastructure
Add an article
the infrastructure
an infrastructure
show examples
 for
bicycles
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
 as storage places. In the
last
Linking Words
, it is not comfortable like
motorbike
Add an article
a motorbike
show examples
, and
exhausted
Correct article usage
an exhausted
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 rider will be tired by
physical
Add an article
the physical
show examples
 load. In my opinion
bicycle
Use synonyms
 good choice for metropolis citizens, it is cheap and does not
crate
Correct your spelling
create
show examples
 greenhouse gases, which destroy the local ecology. In conclusion,
Use synonyms
bicycle
Add an article
the bicycle
a bicycle
show examples
 has a
lot
Use synonyms
 of advantages, like as low cost, ecofriendly and healthy.
However
Linking Words
, there has a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 with using
bicycles
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, the
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 chance of road
incident
Fix the agreement mistake
incidents
show examples
 and cities do not have
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
enough level of
infrastructures
Fix the agreement mistake
infrastructure
show examples
 for comfortable bike using.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Zero Emissions
  • Cardiovascular Exercise
  • Cost-Effective
  • Traffic Congestion
  • Green Environment
  • Vulnerable to Accidents
  • Insufficient Bike Lanes
  • Weather Conditions
  • Urban Areas
  • Practicality
  • Infrastructure
What to do next:
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