not many people in countries in the world go to and enjoy concerts and plays. Why is this the case? Should they be encouraged to attend and learn more about this genre of art?

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It is obvious that in many nations, there are few

youngsters

Use synonyms

who attend and enjoy musical shows. There are many reasons for

this

Linking Words

phenomenon and I am of the opinion that they should be motivated to go to live concerts.

To begin

Linking Words

with, one of the main causes for

this

Linking Words

problem is the expensive ticket price. In many concerts and plays, especially those which have famous artists and bands, the cost of tickets is pushed up too high. What I mean is that most young people are not being able to buy as they are mainly students or fresh graduates who are generally struggling to make ends meet.

Therefore

Linking Words

, paying a large sum of money for live performances seem to be financially wasteful.

In addition

Linking Words

, a wide range of

youngsters

Use synonyms

is afraid of being in a crowd. Having to stand in a crowd to enjoy music makes them feel suffocated, breathless, and their vision is

also

Linking Words

limited. What’s more, many music performances

last

Linking Words

for even four to five hours, which make the young people stand for a long time and be very tired.

However

Linking Words

, it is worth encouraging the young generation to take time to learn about the beauty of

this

Linking Words

genre of art and there are a variety of ways for

this

Linking Words

Firstly

Linking Words

, to attract more

youngsters

Use synonyms

, the organizers should reduce some unnecessary additional charges.

Secondly

Linking Words

, the way forward could be to organize shows with limited guests.

Finally

Linking Words

, personal seats should be provided to make it more comfortable for the audience to enjoy the concert. In conclusion, not many

youngsters

Use synonyms

participate in live concerts and plays due to reasons

such

Linking Words

as price, crowd and seats. From my perspective, the organizers and government should take action to solve these problems.

haioanhcongviecWed Sep 15 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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not many people in countries in the world go to and enjoy concerts and plays. Why is this the case? Should they be encouraged to attend and learn more about this genre of art?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that advertising is extremely succesfull at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organiasation. why might this be case what could be the disadvantages of being self-employed