IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#person’s #status #possessions #values #honour #kindness #trust
Material possession has been in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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recent years be used to judge people as compared
in
Change preposition
to
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 the past.
This
 is so due to
development
Add an article
the development
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 of
internet
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the internet
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. Old fashioned values no longer matter in the upcoming generation.
Development
Correct article usage
The development
show examples
 of social media has become a
media
Fix the agreement mistake
medium
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 where especial the young generation can display their possessions.
For example
, socialites hire luxurious clothes for certain photoshoots which
is
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are
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then
 posted
in
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on
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 their social media pages which in return increase their followers and
also
 their
status
 in the community.
This
has
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tohas
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 lead many youths to engage in criminal activities
such
 as fraud because
this
 will enable them
get
Add the particle
to get
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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luxurious items
hence
 increase their
status
.
Secondly
, peer pressure among the large population has been made to believe when you are poor you are worthless. Children strife so much to have to own material because their
status
 increases.
For instance
, during fundraisers in my
village
Add a comma
,village
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 only people with big businesses will be invited as main speakers as compared to a small-scale farmer.
This
 notion has been very bad especially when growing up. Old virtues are inborn and
believe
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belief
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 should continue to be to judge someone's worth. Material
get
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gets
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 lost over the years and
this
 will in the end decrease your social
status
.
For example
, Nelson Mandela is still remembered for the good values he possessed to date but those with wealth once lost we disregard you in the community. In my conclusion,I agree with the statement.Old fashioned values still get
a
Correct article usage
the
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 upper hand when judging someone's worth.The idea of using material possession judge should be dropped. Material possession
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 not there permanently.
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Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social status
  • Material possessions
  • Old-fashioned values
  • Honour
  • Kindness
  • Trust
  • Judged
  • Importance
  • Traditional
  • Reflection
  • Achievements
  • Hard work
  • Disregarded
  • Well-balanced
  • Meaningful
  • Cultural norms
  • Societal norms
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