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In some countries, parents expect children to spend long time studying both in and after school, and have less free time. Do you think it has the positive or negative effects on children and society?

#countries #parents #children #time #school #effects #society
It is argued by some people
students
 should learn as much as possible
ratherthan
Correct your spelling
rather than
 waste
time
 for other activities. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 it would
creative
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create
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 numerous merits than demerits. I will explain both
prons
Correct your spelling
pros
show examples
 and cons to prove my
perspection
Correct your spelling
perspective
.
First
 and foremost,education is significant to enhance the
knowledge
 which is essential .
students
 has to spend more
time
 for
studies
 it would help them to acquire more academic
knowledge
 that should pivotal to achieve more marks in examinations.For evidence, for admission in university majority of colleges prefer
students
 who
has
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have
show examples
 achieved good marks in academic after completing
course
Add an article
the course
a course
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 with the
knowledge
students
 can find a job which gives attractive salaries it would bright their future.
Moreover
 ,schooling is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 crucial period for
studies
.children Do not have any other things to worry their primary responsibility should be
learn
Fix the infinitive
to learn
show examples
 academics. So it would make them more capable to focus in a particular arena. The
students
 who
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 more
knowledge
 would
Add a missing verb
be the
show examples
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 asset for society.
However
 ,continuous
studies
 would
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create
show examples
creat
Correct your spelling
create
show examples
 many consequences. Children should miss the
chances
Fix the agreement mistake
chance
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 find
time
 for
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
show examples
 and other activities which affect their physical and mental health.
moreover
 ,
invention
Add an article
the invention
an invention
show examples
 of new technologies
creats
Correct your spelling
creates
create
 more way for
studies
therefore
student
Add an article
the student
show examples
 has to spend
time
 in front of
laptop
Add an article
the laptop
a laptop
show examples
 for their study purposes. It leads
several
Change preposition
to several
show examples
 health issues. To conclude,
studies
 should be pivotal for
students
 whereas they have to
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find
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fine
Correct your spelling
find
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 some
time
 for other activities
also
.
student
Fix the agreement mistake
Students
show examples
 should not spend the whole day for
studies
however
 their primary responsibility
to
Add a missing verb
is to
show examples
be learn
Change the verb form
learn
show examples
 books.
Submitted by Shalushiva6582 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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