Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere.

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The belief of individuals in society that the authority of the country is Unnecessarily allocating the budgets towards fine arts as
this
Linking Words
amount could be allocated somewhere else. I hold to
this
Linking Words
opinion because the funds could be utilized for
improvement
Correct article usage
the improvement
show examples
of education and
health
Use synonyms
care
facility
Fix the agreement mistake
facilities
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.
Firstly
Linking Words
, teaching plays
a
Change the article
an
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important role in society and should be prioritized over arts and culture. The amount could be diverted towards constructing new schools and training institutes which would increase the countries literacy rate and the country having more
skillful
Change the spelling
skilful
show examples
labour which would help the economy to rise.
Secondly
Linking Words
, as
Use synonyms
health
Add an article
the health
show examples
of the people is the most important factor in any society, investment should be made toward
health
Use synonyms
infrastructure
for example
Linking Words
in villages
were
Correct your spelling
where
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good
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
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and doctors are not available.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the needy people could be given free of charge services
as
Change preposition
apply
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like the developed countries where the
health
Use synonyms
care program is sponsored by the ministry of the country. To summarize, I completely agree that the issues relating to education and
health
Use synonyms
care
facility
Fix the agreement mistake
facilities
show examples
should be given a premium focus over arts and culture.
Submitted by apurva9999d on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • enriching society
  • promoting cultural understanding
  • development of talent
  • creative industries
  • economic benefits
  • generate revenue
  • cultural heritage
  • identity
  • prioritize spending
  • needs of the majority
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