In today’s competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents’ absence. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In the stressful and competitive globalization, the majority of families think it essential for both mom and father to go out to work. While a few people argue that the
children
in these households benefit from extra earnings, others believe that their parent’s absence makes them have a shortage of support.
This
essay will analyze both points of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view

It seems that views may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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.
To begin
with, the most noticeable is that with hard-
workingwith
Correct your spelling
working with

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parents
, the
children
can have more opportunities to develop all aspects and enjoy their
life
without any worries about their living and studying conditions.
For example
, in recent days,
children
’s study and necessity require a considerable amount of money which usually can be afforded by extra earnings of
parents
, and
therefore
,
children
can stimulate their potential ability as well as creativity which can be useful for their
future
life
. Another reason is that
parents
may be
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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role model for their
children
and make them know how money is important in the
future
.
Therefore
,
children
have a straight-forward and motivation to become the version of themselves in the
future
.
Hence
,
children
living in these families can benefit and grow up in all aspects.
Nonetheless
, it is worth mentioning that the lack of support from
parents
may make them feel abandoned especially in making crucial decisions. Take young
children
as a primary instance, due to the lack of social experience,
children
whose
parents
are never by their side will have many difficulties in the
longin
Correct your spelling
long

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long run.
Moreover
,
children
can easily suffer from many mental diseases
such
as insecurity, depression and so on which can negatively affect their
mind
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minds

It seems that mind may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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because of loneliness.
Last
but not least,
parents
play a vital role in the
children’
Correct your spelling
children's

The word children' doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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future
life
. In conclusion, from my perspective,
parents
are responsible for the welfare of
children
, having enough money to afford their
life
is important but
parents
also
need to spend more time on their
children
to get to know more about them and build strong
relationshipsrelationship
Correct your spelling
relationships relationship

The word relationshipsrelationship is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

.
Submitted by nguyennhuypy on

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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