Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

It is a common belief that food and beverage cooperations add up more sweetener on their
products
which would be the reason for a raising in
health
issues, and the
prices
of those
products
should be higher than others goods to entice customers
less
Change preposition
to less
show examples
consume
sugar
.
Nevertheless
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
am against that idea as inappropriate
prices
would provoke contentious problems.
Besides
, there are
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
more reasonable ways to increase awareness among people about
health
problems.
To begin
with, imposing higher and
imbalance
Correct your spelling
imbalanced
show examples
prices
on sugary
products
would start an endless
controversal
Correct your spelling
controversial
issue. The main questions would be which goods will be affected; or which benefits that food and beverage industries would receive.
Moreover
,
sugar
also
plays a vital role in general
health
In
additional
Replace the word
addition
show examples
, there are other solutions to
health
degradation problems. One way to raise
heath
Correct your spelling
health
show examples
awareness is
forming
Change preposition
by forming
show examples
publicly nutrition programs that people from various
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
stages could participate in.
Sugar
is often misunderstood as it
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
diabetes and heart diseases.
However
, power extracting from
sugar
is used for people daily activities. The programs intend
providing
Change the verb form
to provide
show examples
a comprehensive view on
sugar
, and how it could
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
positively on our life. According to
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
recent research, diabetes patients is offered
sugar
-less menus or consuming exchanging sweeten. The patients are
also
conscious
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
sugar
advantages, and prohibiting
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sugar
would harm their
health
too.
In
Change preposition
To
show examples
summarise, it is
definately
Correct your spelling
definitely
unreasonable when increasing
sugar
products
prices
to stimulate customers
consume
Add the particle
to consume
show examples
less
sugar
.
Submitted by nguyetduong549 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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