IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people claim that public museums and art galleries will not be needed because people can see historical objects and work of arts by using a computer. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #museums #art #galleries #objects #work #arts #computer
As a tool for understanding ancient monuments and
artefacts
, the advent of the digital age has provided many advantages. Many
people
 believe that the advent of the internet has rendered the existence of art galleries and public museums obsolete. As outlined in the following paragraphs, I am opposed to
this
 position.
First
 of all,
people
 increasingly use the internet to find
information
 about historical objects and works on account of its convenience and time-saving qualities.
Moreover
,
people
 can access a wealth of
information
 about what they need,
such
 as paintings, authors, or history, by simply clicking on a hyperlink.
Furthermore
, the opening time is unlimited as well as the
information
 data available. Even so, I believe that the
information
 about an object differs greatly from the experience of being in the presence of items we deem significant historically or culturally. As an example, when viewing war
artefacts
 at a museum, we can experience the suffering and meaning associated with the memorabilia and
artefacts
.
In addition
, art exhibitions and architectural works play a key role in attracting tourists, so they can learn and enjoy the perfect view that derives from the country's architectural style. The President Ho Chi Minh Mausoleum,
for example
, is visited by millions of
people
 each year simply to appreciate its grand architecture.
As a result
, if there are no places for storing
artefacts
 and memorabilia of history, the country will not only lose its advantage in the tourism sector, but local children will
also
 not be able to see what they have been taught in school. Taking everything into account, search engines and
information
 technology cannot replace museums and art galleries. Specifically, it has distinct cultural imprints throughout the world and has a profound effect on economics and education.
Submitted by thanhannguyen2209 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: