IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

All students should study art and music in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#students #study #art #music #school
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
As the value of
art
Use synonyms
 and
music
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 in high
school
Use synonyms
 has been acknowledged by educational experts in modern society, many people believe that
art
Use synonyms
 and
music
Use synonyms
 should be compulsory
classes
Use synonyms
. I support
this
Linking Words
 idea because
art
Use synonyms
 and
music
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 help high
school
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
 to develop skills that academic subjects do not.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
art
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 should be required in high
school
Use synonyms
 because they allow
students
Use synonyms
 to express their emotions. Many
students
Use synonyms
 have reported that
art
Use synonyms
 is the way they express complex ideas that they have no other way to communicate to others.
For example
Linking Words
, in other academic
classes
Use synonyms
, there is no opportunity for
students
Use synonyms
 to express their emotions in an appropriate way. Since
art
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 offer
students
Use synonyms
 an alternative to academic subjects,
art
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 can be beneficial to many
students
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it is clear that the high
school
Use synonyms
 curriculum should include
art
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 as a basic requirement.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
music
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 should be mandatory because they provide
students
Use synonyms
 with a chance to discover unknown talents. Since
students
Use synonyms
 spend most of their time at
school
Use synonyms
 learning traditional subjects like math and science,
students
Use synonyms
 who have artistic talent may not have a chance to discover
this
Linking Words
 ability. In
this
Linking Words
 respect, making
music
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 compulsory will ensure that
students
Use synonyms
 receive a well-rounded education that prepares them for their future.
Therefore
Linking Words
, even if
students
Use synonyms
 do not have artistic talent, participating in
music
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 in high
school
Use synonyms
 should be required. To sum up, it is undeniable that
art
Use synonyms
 and
music
Use synonyms
classes
Use synonyms
 should be included in the high
school
Use synonyms
 curriculum because they allow
students
Use synonyms
 to express their emotions and find their talents.
Submitted by jin960524 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: