Being a celebrity– such as a film star or singer – brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?

In the age of change, the career path of famous celebrities is quite clear,
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
some people
avoide
Correct your spelling
avoid
public attention, the others thrive for it. Those who
pursuit
Replace the word
pursue
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fame and attention do not care much about the
inconveniance
Correct your spelling
inconvenience
that it might bring, the others afraid of change and its negative aspects. I support the idea that being a public
role-model
Correct your spelling
role model
show examples
has uncountable benefits and in
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
I will discuss some of them. On the
first
hand, in order to become a celebrity, one must work hard, shape perfect skills and be patient. The path is not quite easy, but if you are already well known it means that you, as a person, are perfect in your field. Of course, not everyone can be a celebrity as being
perisitant
Correct your spelling
persistent
, accepting failures and defining the exact targets are the core values that define a true professional, and if a person is known that means he already masters
this
skillset. As an example, I would like to tell
about
Correct pronoun usage
you about
show examples
my friend who wanted to become a movie star. During our school years, he was
excellant
Correct your spelling
excellent
at all the classes and never missed or skipped any
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
performance. He often repeated that only
stong
Correct your spelling
strong
show examples
and
target oriented
Add a hyphen
target-oriented
show examples
people can succeed. Now, he has become the most demanded actor in Armenia and it is a pleasure to see his play. I clearly remember his recent tweet about
life
as he mentioned that he has reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
his
life
goals and he feels fully satisfied.
On the other hand
, celebrities have lots of resources and
previlagies
Correct your spelling
privileges
. They are considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
VIP
Fix the agreement mistake
VIPs
show examples
, meaning Very important persons. When thinking about them and their
life
I always remember Meghan Trainor's song where she was telling how blessed is she and that "she never pays for her dreams". I concur that problems are not big issues unless we think they are. So if anyone thinks he does not deserve to be known, probably he is right. Of
course
Add a comma
,course
show examples
there are other examples of people,
such
as the "Backstreet
boys
Change the capitalization
Boys
show examples
" group, who ended up their career just to be as normal as others. To me being ordinary means having many problems and not enjoying
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
fully. To sum up, I would like to mention again that I support the idea of being famous as I believe it is very profitable. Being the
taghest
Correct your spelling
toughest
highest
thing ever, it brings
such
benefits that are worthy to fight for. I hope one day I will be perfect enough to become a celebrity in my field.
Submitted by hasmique.mkhitaryan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: