Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth rather than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To What extent do you agree or disagree?

It is true that the stars are known more for their charm and riches rather than their accomplishments. And I agree that the youth are negatively impacted by
this
. In the essay, I will try to explain how
this
trend affects young minds and what are the negative impacts of the same. Young people are more attracted to the extravagant lifestyle and physical appearances of celebrities. Being at the adolescent age, they want to stand apart from the rest of their peers. They start picking up the mannerisms of their idols.
For example
, consider a star smoking on the screen of a blockbuster movie. Many youngsters watch the movie and take it as a fact that smoking is a way to look superior to your peers. But in reality, smoking is habit-forming and very harmful for their health.
In addition
to that, sadly, we live in a very materialistic age. A person's value and status in society are determined by how much money he has, what car he has and so on. The youth want to lead
such
a life but are not ready to put in the work to get to the position of making
such
a life for themselves. Some of them resort to shortcuts in the path to success.
For instance
, one of the kids in the neighbourhood was so caught up in one of the shows that he got involved in drug peddling and ended up in jail. In conclusion, I would like to say that the facade of beauty and exuberant lifestyles of famous people has a negative impact on the minds of kids unless they have been taught that there is no shortcut to success.
Submitted by prash_net85 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • glamour
  • wealth
  • achievements
  • portrayed
  • overshadow
  • influenced
  • lifestyles
  • unrealistic
  • expectations
  • values
  • promoting
  • hard work
  • perseverance
  • inspire
  • positive impact
What to do next:
Look at other essays: