IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

#people #work #organization #life #organisations
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The vast majority of workmen encounter the dilemmas of whether to stay at the same companies for the entire time or frequently change to others. There are various factors that must be taken into consideration before one decides to change their career.
Although
Linking Words
, remaining at the same
company
Use synonyms
 provide promotion and a thorough understanding of the job's tasks, changing workplace trends to have more advantages. 
Individual
Fix the agreement mistake
Individuals
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 who work for the same
company
Use synonyms
able
Add a missing verb
are able
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 to gain profound knowledge about all the processes and become familiar with
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
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.
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
Relationships
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 are formed between co-workers. get promoted to
the
Correct article usage
a
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 higher position.
For instance
Linking Words
, my friend’s father has been working for the advertising agency, Dentsu Thailand, for almost
over
Change preposition
apply
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40 years. He got promoted from an ordinary accountant to the chief financial officer, where ten branches worldwide of
Use synonyms
company
Add an article
the company
a company
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 are under his responsibility. Change environment. Know yourself, find new
competences
Correct your spelling
competencies
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.Gain
broad
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a broad
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 range of experiences. Learn how each organization manage. Meet lots of people with different backgrounds and talents. Despite the fact that working with the same
company
Use synonyms
 provides familiarity and
Submitted by methamongsri on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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