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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Drug abuse is dangerous to society. Give the problems and suggests some solutions.

#drug #abuse #society
Nowadays, many
crimes
 committed in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society are related to illegal uses of
Add an article
the drug
show examples
drug
Fix the agreement mistake
drugs
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.
Additionally
, consumption of illegal
substances
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
 to severe consequences.
Therefore
, every
communities
Change to a singular noun
community
show examples
 must take serious
actions
Fix the agreement mistake
action
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 to eliminate these problems. The consumption of
drugs
 not only cause health diseases but
also
 higher chances of committing
crimes
.
Drug
Fix the agreement mistake
Drugs
show examples
 have possible chances of changing the way
people
 minds and bodies function.
Moreover
, sometimes overdose, which happened when individuals intake
the
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apply
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excessive amounts of
substances
, can lead to several illnesses
both
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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mental and physical,
such
 as
hallucination
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hallucinations
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, cancer or even death.
Also
, It can make
people
 become more aggressive since they are not fully conscious.
People
 who take
drugs
 have more chance of becoming more
violence
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violent
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 and furious.
For instance
, there are lots of news about domestic
crimes
,
which
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in which
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 drunk men violently attack
his
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their
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 families. To be more precise, teenagers who
addicted
Add a missing verb
are addicted
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 to alcohol are likely to
got
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get
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 out of school and completely ruined their lives. There are numerous solutions that can be done to alleviate
this harmful situations
Change the determiner
this harmful situation
these harmful situations
show examples
 caused by
drugs
 in
the
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apply
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society. To prevent
further
 dangerous incidents that might
happened
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happen
show examples
 strict laws must be used. Government should completely ban all
uses
Fix the agreement mistake
use
show examples
 of
Add an article
the drug
show examples
drug
Fix the agreement mistake
drugs
show examples
, except for medical reasons. The authorities ought to strongly focus on the ways to prohibit any sales of illegal
drugs
, like
heroine
Correct your spelling
heroin
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, morphine and weed. The punishment must
also
 be taken seriously for those who commit the
crimes
 according to
drug
 abuse. Another solution is that
people
 must be educated about the consequences that follow when they take
substances
.
In addition
, for those who want to quit
drug
Add an article
the drug
show examples
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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go in the process of
drug
 addiction therapy.
Additionally
, In conclusion, illegal
substances
 lead to several negatives problems.
Therefore
, in
oder
Correct your spelling
order
 to provide
safe
Correct article usage
a safe
show examples
 and peaceful society, problems of abusive actions caused by
drugs
 need to be banished.
Submitted by methamongsri on

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