In some countries people encourage teenagers to find part time jobs. Some people agree and others don't. Review both sides and give your opinion.

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There is no doubt that working from a young age makes us independent and self
displined
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disciplined
discipline
. While some people believe that
this
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trend should not be followed, others argue that it helps to build
strong minded
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strong-minded
show examples
teenagers. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument and explain my support for the latter view. One of the most important
drawback
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drawbacks
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of teenagers involved in
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part
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part-time
show examples
time
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jobs
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is
time
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management. The
younsters
Correct your spelling
youngsters
who work in any
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part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
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job are mostly
undergarduate
Correct your spelling
undergraduate
students or higher secondary students, because of their
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part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
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jobs
Use synonyms
they get very
less
Correct quantifier usage
little
show examples
time
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for their studies which in turn leads to bad scores in their
marksheets
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mark sheets
.
Additionally
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, some
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part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
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jobs
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includes
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include
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morning and
late night
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late-night
show examples
shifts, which is the most important
time
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for good sleep. As a
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result
reult
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,reult
show examples
it directly
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affects
show examples
effects
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affects
show examples
the productivity of
the
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apply
show examples
teenagers.
However
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,
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part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
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jobs
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gives
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give
show examples
the opportunity to experience
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real-time
show examples
real
Correct article usage
the real
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time
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world apart from studies and college life. Working experience gives the chance to learn from your own mistakes from a very young age, that
hepls
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helps
to build
the
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a
show examples
stronger future.
For example
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, there are some students who
does
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do
show examples
not have any financial support for their education, they can earn their living and
fulfill
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fulfil
show examples
their dreams, and achieve their goals
by
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on
show examples
their own. In conclusion, working
as
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apply
show examples
a
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apply
show examples
Use synonyms
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
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can be proven hectic for
young
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the young
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generation. In my opinion benefits of
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part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
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time
Add a comma
,time
show examples
jobs
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in young generation are
outweighted
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outweighed
by the
drwabacks
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drawbacks
, I would prefer
top
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to
show examples
indulge my children in
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part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
Use synonyms
jobs
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by anirudhgaurag on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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