In some countries people encourage teenagers to find part time jobs. Some people agree and others don't. Review both sides and give your opinion.

#countries #people #teenagers #part #time #jobs #review

There is no doubt that working from a young age makes us independent and self

displined

Correct your spelling

disciplined

discipline

. While some people believe that

this

trend should not be followed, others argue that it helps to build

strong minded

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strong-minded

show examples

teenagers. In

this

essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument and explain my support for the latter view. One of the most important

drawback

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drawbacks

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of teenagers involved in

part

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part-time

show examples

time

jobs

time

management. The

younsters

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youngsters

who work in any

part

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part-time

show examples

time

job are mostly

undergarduate

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undergraduate

students or higher secondary students, because of their

part

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part-time

show examples

time

jobs

they get very

less

Correct quantifier usage

little

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time

for their studies which in turn leads to bad scores in their

marksheets

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mark sheets

Additionally

, some

part

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part-time

show examples

time

jobs

includes

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include

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morning and

late night

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late-night

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shifts, which is the most important

time

for good sleep. As a

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result

reult

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,reult

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it directly

Replace the word

affects

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effects

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affects

show examples

the productivity of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

teenagers.

However

part

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part-time

show examples

time

jobs

gives

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give

show examples

the opportunity to experience

Add a hyphen

real-time

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real

Correct article usage

the real

show examples

time

world apart from studies and college life. Working experience gives the chance to learn from your own mistakes from a very young age, that

hepls

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helps

to build

the

Correct article usage

show examples

stronger future.

For example

, there are some students who

does

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show examples

not have any financial support for their education, they can earn their living and

fulfill

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fulfil

show examples

their dreams, and achieve their goals

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show examples

their own. In conclusion, working

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

can be proven hectic for

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation. In my opinion benefits of

part

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part-time

show examples

time

Add a comma

,time

show examples

jobs

in young generation are

outweighted

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outweighed

by the

drwabacks

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drawbacks

, I would prefer

top

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show examples

indulge my children in

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

jobs

Submitted by anirudhgaurag on Fri Sep 24 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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In some countries people encourage teenagers to find part time jobs. Some people agree and others don't. Review both sides and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people argue that the retirement age should be raised significantly, given that average life expectancy has increased greatly. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that public libraries are an important public resource and should be free. Others say that they are just a waste of public money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries , owing a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negativbe situation?

some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.