IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. A friend of yours is thinking of going on a camping holiday for the first time this summer. He/She has asked for your advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter • explain why you think your friend would enjoy a camping holiday • describe some possible disadvantages • say whether you would like to go camping with your friend this summer

#minutes #friend #holiday #first #time #summer #advice
Dear Nilu, I hope you are doing well. I think
this
 upcoming summer is going to be the best summer ever. I really appreciate your idea to go camping because we have never done that before, and it will be a remarkable memory for everyone. I know you are excited to experience the camping because we can enjoy as much as we want without any distractions. I have an idea about a place near a river where we can go for a swim,
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
fishing and kayaking.
However
, there are some difficulties to face
while
 camping because we do not have many facilities at the camping site.
Furthermore
, we have to be well prepared for everything, especially cooking and toileting. I am pretty sure we can manage those kinds of things. I would love to join you in
this
 exciting adventure. I am eagerly waiting for a quick reply from you. Let us arrange a date as soon as possible and I’ll start to collect the stuff for the camping. Best Regards, Lahiru
Submitted by lahiru_80 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To further improve, consider adding more detail about why you think your friend would specifically enjoy camping, such as enjoying nature or the simplicity of living outdoors.
Coherence & Cohesion
For even better coherence, you might also explore connecting your ideas more explicitly, using transition phrases that clearly show cause and effect, contrast, or sequence.
Coherence & Cohesion
You did a great job of structuring your letter, with a clear introduction, development of ideas, and a conclusion.
Task Achievement
The friendly and encouraging tone throughout the letter is perfectly suited for writing to a friend about a shared potential adventure.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: