For a long time art has been considered an essential part of all cultures in the world. However, nowadays people’s values have changed, and we tend to consider science, technology and business more important than arts. What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to draw people’s attention to art?

It has been observed that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
every part of the planet had a great history for
art
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
while having many differences between each culture. Presently developing with technology, Science and modern business, the community are moving away from
art
.
This
is mainly because of the lack of
time
that
people
are having with their employments and there are paramount of solution can be taken to make internet on
art
.
Firstly
,
Art
can be considered as a leisure
time
activity. In the modern world it's more difficult to find
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
leisure
time
with the current working environment and the job pressure,
also
cannot get leave as on request as on request. As an example, Most of the population doing part-
timetime
Correct your spelling
time time
time-time
jobs after working hours to overcome the end of month commitments since paramount the expenses in every other product and service. Owing to the lack of free
time
people
are moving away from
art
as they are struggling
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
a day to day life.
Secondly
, Science and Technology is the future of development while the Modern lifestyle is based on automation. As an example, In early ,childhood we use to play with some handmade toy cars, Cart and other simple toys and nowadays even kids are not moving outside and just into some computer games and for even drawing they are using computers and cause of development of the machinery.
However
, as a
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
solution it should be conceded to more work-life balance plans with the employers
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
since it can be more productive as well as more beneficial to institutes. While society can get more leisure
time
they can utilize
time
for some activity
such
as watching drama or a visit cultural place with their family and friends.
Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
show examples
people
who are more in the subject of
art
usually will take more interest in
art
. In conclusion ,Due to the busyness of the
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
employments
people
are moving away from the
art
and by creating work-life balance plan can be effective to make community interest on
art
.
Submitted by nalindaliyanage on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • STEM fields (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics)
  • evolve
  • technological advancements
  • overshadowing
  • financial pressures
  • practical careers
  • digital entertainment
  • accessible
  • integrated
  • curricula
  • fostering
  • emotional intelligence
  • public art projects
  • engage
  • interactive
What to do next:
Look at other essays: