IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that the difference between the lowest paid jobs and the highest paid jobs should be reduced. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #difference #jobs
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It is considered by many individuals that the gap difference
in
Change preposition
between
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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high paying jobs and low paying jobs must be decreased. I agree with the given statement and there are two reasons why I think so and they will be
expained
Correct your spelling
explained
 in the
next
Linking Words
 few paragraphs.
First
Linking Words
 of all, economic equality can be achieved in the country. It is a
well known
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well-known
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 fact that for a developing economy it is imperative to provide equal wages for the same kind of job during the employment in the industry so that
people
Use synonyms
 can compete and earn on the same
level
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 have
differnt
Correct your spelling
different
 skill set for various jobs.
For instance
Linking Words
,
Correct your spelling
Canadian
Indian
candian
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the candian
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 government provide
same
Correct article usage
the same
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 wages to different qualified
people
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 on the
Correct your spelling
basis
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bais
Correct your spelling
basis
show examples
 of hours worked. In short, individuals getting the same wages will balance the economy in every sector.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 income
level
Use synonyms
 will ease
Correct your spelling
government
governmnet
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the governmnet
show examples
 in
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policy making
Correct your spelling
policymaking
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. Needless to say that higher
Use synonyms
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
 of authorities face grave challenges in
policy
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 formulation for
differnt
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different
 segments of
people
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 during the economic planning as different
societie's
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societies
society's
 needs have to be considered to benefit them from estate schemes. Having a homogenous
group
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 will save the precious time of the
governmnet's
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government's
 experts. To
illustarte
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illustrate
, China has
many
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much
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 different income
Use synonyms
group
Change to a plural noun
groups
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 of
people
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 and it is difficult to make
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policy
Fix the agreement mistake
policies
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 for each of them.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
hetrogenous
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heterogenous
heterogeneous
group
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 of
people
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 inhibits issues in the
policy
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 formulation. In conclusion, having
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 same
level
Use synonyms
 of income
group
Use synonyms
 will attract more workforce in a nation and will
also
Linking Words
 help the government in long term
policy
Use synonyms
 formulation.
Submitted by rahat on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • income inequality
  • equitable
  • living standards
  • disadvantaged individuals
  • social unrest
  • crime rates
  • wage disparities
  • supply and demand
  • high-skilled workers
  • incentivize
What to do next:
Look at other essays: