Some people believe that studying at university or colleges is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, it is a popular belief that pursuing higher
education
is the prime option for an outstanding
career
.
However
, others may argue that working right after graduating high
school
is the better option.
This
essay will discuss both views and demonstrate how going for
further
education
is more recommended than the latter. Attending higher
education
have better chances for success by providing individuals with deeper knowledge on a specific field.
This
means
,
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young adults are being equipped with information and skills that are essential for their chosen
career
path.
Moreover
, students gain experience that
are
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is

The plural verb are does not appear to agree with the singular subject experience. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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highly specific to their future profession through programs like internships.
For instance
, to become a doctor, one has to go through medical
school
to be taught
on
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apply

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the
Correct article usage
apply

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human anatomy and have hands-on practical classes.
On the contrary
, diving into the workforce after completing 12 years of
school
saves time and money for some. In some occupations that require more practical skills, experience is the efficient way to learn. By gaining experience early on, people manage to get ahead
on
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in

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their
career
progression. Not only that, formal
education
such
as college and university may be a waste of money, especially when their specific needs are not catered
.
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to.

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As an illustration, a chef may be better off by working in a restaurant rather than attending university, which mostly
do
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does

The plural verb do does not appear to agree with the singular subject university. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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not provide cookery majors. Unfortunately, in
this
era, many people still view higher
education
as a qualifying
criteria
Correct the article-noun agreement
criterion

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun criteria in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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when looking for employees.
Therefore
, obtaining higher
education
is crucial to a
properous
Correct your spelling
prosperous

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career
.
Thankfullly
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Thankfully

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, various educational institutions now provide wider options
of
Change preposition
for

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in-depth training of certain job
skillls
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skills

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.
This
has allowed people who are interested in various skilled occupations to obtain a higher qualification and earn better
career
opportunities.
Hence
, the idea to obtain higher
education
remained beneficial regardless. In conclusion, there will be divided
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions

It seems that opinion may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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on whether going for higher
education
or getting a job after high
school
is more important for success. As aforementioned, the demand for higher
education
is still relevant to
this
day.
Thus
, I believe attending college or university provides better opportunities in my future
career
.
Submitted by florencia.frederica on

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Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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