IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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Majority
Correct article usage
The majority

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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 of professionals avoid drastic changes as they love their profession and are satisfied with what they earn and spend their time with. An artist
for example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 would be passionate and even though he earns less. There are workers who stick to their routine jobs as they are afraid to take
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks

It seems that risk may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 which can lead to
loss
Correct article usage
the loss

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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 of their regular income. Some personnel continue doing repetitive things as they lack education, training or resources.
Large
Add an article
A large

The noun phrase Large portion seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 portion of
population
Add an article
the population

The noun phrase population seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 comes under
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 category of routine life schedule which ultimately leads to frustration and a sense of dissatisfaction. History has taught us that for any species to survive or grow, they need to be ready to embrace or create changes
which
Correct pronoun usage
that

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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 are conducive to themselves. If a person does not experience new things or opinions, he will never know the power of change which could be beneficial for him. With the availability of new technologies
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 as
internet
Correct article usage
the internet

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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 and communication, knowledge is readily available to
a
Correct article usage
the

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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 common man.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 information is creating a realization in the present generation leading to research and inventions on a daily basis. Change is not only in terms of jobs or work culture but
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 in the mindset wherein people are open to new ideas. It is not surprising that today the largest global corporations are the ones with the latest innovation which provide
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities

It seems that community may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 better quality of life. It is
these
Correct determiner usage
this

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

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 sort of varied approach which has provoked humankind to create new medicines, modes of transport, gadgets and an endless list of daily used
machineries
Change the wording
machinery
types of machinery
pieces of machinery

It appears that machineries is an uncountable noun and should not be made plural. Consider changing the noun.

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. These evolutionary steps have made human beings the most dominant species on
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 planet.
Finally
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is the search for something new, that will make man superior and equip him to carve his destiny. Please can you provide feedback for the essay

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • status quo
  • stagnation
  • routine
  • comfort zone
  • predictability
  • specialization
  • innate
  • personal growth
  • adaptability
  • fast-paced
  • new horizons
  • equilibrium
  • progress
  • dynamic
  • transformation
What to do next:
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