Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children. To what extent do you agree?

#people #media #coverage #celebrities #effect #children

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It is today a norm that

celebrities

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nearly cover all means of media fully. Some

people

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oppose

this

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prevalence of famous

people

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for fear of detrimental impacts on the young generation. I,

however

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, totally support

this

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tendency for the benefits of children’s development and future preparation.

First

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and foremost,

celebrities

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play an essential role in children’s physical and mental growth. For the former, it is obvious that the prevalence of idols has inspired an increasingly tremendous number of youngsters to deter their sedentary lifestyle, which is a contemporary matter of concern. To exemplify, the Kpop dance cover trend has encouraged millions of teenagers to follow and dance as a type of exercise, rather than spending all their time in front of

Correct article usage

the TV

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or laptop for entertainment. For the latter, the influencers can

also

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nurture children’s sense of love and sharing, by motivating them to take part in society-building activities. In Vietnam,

such

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celebrities

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as Ha Anh Tuan, Thuy Tien or Hoai Linh have made a considerable influence on youngsters’ doing charity or other voluntary works to support the community's development.

Second

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but of no less importance, famous

people

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can be exemplary in students’ preparation for the future.

However

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lucky they are,

celebrities

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are always required to make extraordinary efforts to succeed in the competitive market of showbiz. Blackpink, the most popular Kpop group nowadays, with more than twelve hours of daily practice is an evident example. Thanks to them, the message of incessant striving for

Add an article

a dream

the dream

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dream

Fix the agreement mistake

dreams

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is conveyed.

Besides

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, whatever industry the renowned

people

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are working in, it is compulsory for them to master multiskills, ranging from communication, personal branding to marketing or even languages.

This

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makes them a role model for children to be proactive in their self-learning to perfect themselves in disparate areas. In conclusion, I am

firmly

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firm

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of the opinion that the full coverage of superstars in the media positively influences the children, both in their development and their groundwork for the future. By activating parental and school controls to prevent the excessive idolization of children, I believe those aforementioned benefits will be utilized.

Submitted by tranthuhien20395 on Fri Oct 01 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

347 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Celebrity culture
Glamorization
Unrealistic expectations
Self-esteem
Scandals
Role models
Moral development
Mental health
Influence
Exposure
Social media platforms
Charity work
Inappropriate behavior
Perfection image
Negative impact
Inspire children

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Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children. To what extent do you agree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many people use social media every day to get in touch with other people and be aware of news events. Do you think the advantages of this way outweigh the disadvantages?

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

in some cultures, childeren are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

As a result of electronic inventions ,people do less physical activity and this is having a negative effect on their health . To what extent do you agree or disagree