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Writing Samples
Band 6

More and more people today are drinking sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons for this? What are the solutions to make people drink less?

Nowadays, More and more
people
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 are drinking sugar-based
drinks
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such
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 as coke, soda, soft
drinks
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, energy
drinks
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. Especially Teenagers and young adults
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, in particular,
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in particular
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 tend to consume these sugar-based
drinks
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 on a daily demand basis.
This
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 essay will illustrate the reasons for
this
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 phenomenon and offer some feasible solutions to reduce energy
drinks
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 consumption. There are various reasons Why sugar-based
drinks
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 consumption has risen dramatically in recent years. One possible explanation is that Most modern jobs are required require us to spend great concentration and effort to be more and more productive but working or learning for a long period.
As a result
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, we were become tired and lost lose concentration on working.
Therefore
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,
People
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 drink sugar-based
drinks
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 to boost energy for the body and enhance their focus on working. Another reason worth mentioning is that these
drinks
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allows
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allow
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 us to stay awake to work so and,
as a result
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, these sugar-based
drinks
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 are beneficial to us.
However
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 some pestiferous substances in sugar-based
drinks
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such
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 as caffeine, aspartame can lead have led to the fact that more
people
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 are suffering from obesity disease than in
a
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apply
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over the few recent years ago.
Although
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 reducing sugar-based
drinks
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 consumption is a difficult task. But , there are many solutions to encourages
people
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 to stop drinking those
drinks
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 regularly. The
first
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 possible solution is that the government should raise sales tax on those
drinks
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.
This
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 can result in an increase in their prices, thereby discouraging several
people
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 from consuming them. The
second
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 approach is that we can provide with the opportunity to be
people
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's awareness of all adverse impacts on health from drinking it should be raised by organizing campaigns to encourage
people
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 to follow a healthy diet and refrain from drinking sugar-based
drinks
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.  In conclusion, the essay indicates many reasons to explain Why sugar-based
drinks
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 have been consumed by many
people
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, .
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,
.
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 Despite these causes, increasing sales tax on sugar-based
drinks
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 and running healthy diet campaigns to raise consumer awareness of their health are two feasible solutions that mitigate the problem.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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