Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

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Nowadys
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Nowadays
young
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the young
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generation
are
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is
show examples
more
inerested
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interested
in
sports
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specically
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specifically
specially
in
phycially
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physically
harmful activities.There are many danzer
sports
Use synonyms
like
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sky diving and skiing
should
Correct pronoun usage
that should
show examples
be banned.I
stongly
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strongly
agree with
this
Linking Words
statement because
its
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it
show examples
can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
become
physical
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a physical
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disable
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disablement
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and
also
Linking Words
it
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apply
show examples
effects
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affects
show examples
on
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apply
show examples
life
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
with,there are many reasons
government
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the government
show examples
should have to banned
sky diving
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skydiving
show examples
and skiing
due to
Linking Words
younger people are
most
Rephrase
more
show examples
interested
to take
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in taking
show examples
life
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in
Change preposition
at
show examples
huge
risk
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risks
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
really
effects
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affects
show examples
on
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apply
show examples
that
life
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.
As a
Linking Words
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
they cannot be afraid to
loss
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lose
show examples
life
Use synonyms
and
it that
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they
show examples
would
be became
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become
show examples
phycially
Correct your spelling
physically
disable
Wrong verb form
disabled
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
,
Correct article usage
the youngerest
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youngerest
Correct your spelling
younger
youngest
people went to camping and they
wants
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want
show examples
to show friends how to be
sky diving
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skydiving
show examples
and
other friend
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another friend
other friends
show examples
just try it that time they take
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a risk
show examples
risk
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risks
show examples
in
our
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their
show examples
life
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.since they can be
fracture
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fractured
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leg
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legs
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or
may be
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maybe
show examples
arm
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arms
show examples
.They cannot do something in our
life
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.
Moreover
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,
new
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the new
show examples
generation
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
not
concentate
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concentrate
on their
study
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because
there
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their
show examples
sport
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sports
show examples
activities
effects
Verb problem
affect
show examples
on
Use synonyms
study
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studies
show examples
in many ways.
Firstly
Linking Words
,they less time spend on
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Add an article
the study
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study
Wrong verb form
studying
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and
also
Linking Words
they
ae
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are
show examples
alwyas
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always
do some other
danzeruos
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dangerous
activivties
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activities
.if these
sport
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sports
show examples
are banned
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
helps to improve their
study
Use synonyms
.
Government
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The government
show examples
should
have to do
Verb problem
introduce
show examples
some other
sports
Use synonyms
games
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introduces
Verb problem
apply
show examples
because they help to develop interest in other
games
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.
In addition
Linking Words
to
this
Linking Words
,they should promote and give scholarships to their student for other
spots
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sports
show examples
such
Linking Words
as cricket and football.tennis,
Correct word choice
and bedminton
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bedminton
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badminton
.
Its
Correct pronoun usage
It
show examples
helps to take
interest
Correct article usage
an interest
show examples
in these
games
Use synonyms
In conclusion,
government
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the government
show examples
shold
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should
take steps to
banned
Wrong verb form
ban
show examples
some
sports
Use synonyms
Correct word choice
and harmfull
show examples
harmfull
Correct your spelling
harmful
games
Use synonyms
it really
help
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helps
show examples
to improve
Use synonyms
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
and they should reduce
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their our.
Submitted by sukhpreetbadohal92 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on structuring your paragraphs more clearly to enhance logical flow. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence.
task achievement
Ensure each main point is well-supported with evidence or examples. This will strengthen your argument and achieve higher scores.
task achievement
Try to expand your vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and avoid repetitive wording. This will help in making your essay more compelling and clear.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.
task achievement
You show awareness of the issue and attempt to provide reasons for your views, which addresses the task prompt.
task achievement
The essay conveys a clear stance on the topic, making it evident to the reader.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • adrenaline rush
  • risk threshold
  • thrill-seeking
  • safety protocols
  • hazard assessment
  • adventure tourism
  • regulatory framework
  • personal autonomy
  • informed consent
  • risk mitigation strategies
  • thrill-seeking behavior
  • protective gear
  • extreme athleticism
  • freedom of choice
  • accident prevalence
  • emergency response
  • courage and resilience
  • endorphin release
  • legal implications
  • peer pressure effects
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