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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organizations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#information #individuals #internet #companies #organizations #outweigh
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As we live in modern technology developed world, our private
information
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 is kept by some mass associations and businesses. There is a gap between If the advantages of dominance privacy have the privilege of disadvantages. At
first
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, as usage of social media and the
internet
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are
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is
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 growing at a great rate, at the same time the individual confidence
are
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is
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 controlled by some government and business organizations. Because if
internet
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 users are not regulated the number of cyber-crimes magnifies hugely.
For instance
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, If cyber-crimes are committed the police officers or some other government officials may catch the perpetrator through its IP address or some
information
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 obtained from several
organization
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organizations
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.
Therefore
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 it is beneficial If personal details are monitored by organizations.
Secondly
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, there are minuses to post or give private details onto the
internet
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 due to businesses that use
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information
Add an article
the information
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 for their benefit. They may manipulate people through their preferences posted on the
internet
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. To exemplify, If the sales managers attain some
information
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 about the product preferences of users, they use
this
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 data for attracting new customers. As the result, it may cause consumers to be deceived by their own secret sharing
internet
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 posts. To conclude, openness
give
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gives
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 us a more secure place to live
however
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 it may cause an unconventional situation or consequences for human beings.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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