In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Many think that a plethora of
people
who have some diseases for having an unhealthy diet and eating more fast
foods
.
Therefore
it is believed that governments force
people
to pay more taxes for these products.
toAccording
Correct your spelling
according
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
nature of human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
show examples
,
people
can give up when they paying enormous
prices
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
goods and it is
widespread
Replace the word
widely
show examples
thought to shape
people
’s behaviour. On the one hand,
although
people
in many countries suffering from eating fast
foods
, some
people
think that all
people
have
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
to access
foods
at reasonable
prices
. Because forcing
people
to pay more
prices
is not fair when trying to solve
this
problem and governments bring restaurants to some limits.
For example
,
although
a friend of mine has reached 200 kg. , he continues to eat hamburgers every day from the same restaurant and does not mind the price. If our government were forced the restaurants to bring some sales limit, he would not
attempted
Change the verb form
attempt
show examples
to order on a regular basis.
On the other hand
, others think that governments should arrange the tax level of these products. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
there are many economic problems in many countries and everybody chooses their meals within their budget. Nobody wants to pay more when they can reach reasonable
prices
and these transactions can decrease the consumption of fast
foods
. The most important point to support my idea is, my mother always purchasing our meals considering the
prices
. If she see a different price of the product when comparing the past, she refused to buy.
However
, if someone buys
this
expensive product, the government will be gain more. Taking everything into consideration, the most common idea is forcing
people
to reject some unhealthy
foods
is arranging
prices
with tax levels. I am totally agreeing with
this
statement. Because the vital issue is economy nowadays and it can play a crucial role to
people
’s decisions.
Submitted by basakdiclesahin on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: