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Writing Samples
Band 4

Many people try to balance work and other parts of their life. However, this is very difficult to do. What are the problems associated with this? What is the best way to achieve a better balance?

#people #balance #work #parts #life
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It is undeniable that
work
Use synonyms
-
life
Use synonyms
balance
Use synonyms
 is an important aspect of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human
life
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.
However
Linking Words
, maintaining
this
Linking Words
balance
Use synonyms
 could be difficult among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most
people
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.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss some effects and offer suitable solutions to
this
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 problem.
This
Linking Words
 issue is related
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 some undesirable consequences.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 issue is associated
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the health condition of
people
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. Maintaining
Use synonyms
work-
Correct article usage
a work-life
show examples
life
Use synonyms
balance
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 helps to reduce stress and poor health condition. The reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
Linking Words
, many companies should expect employees to
work
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 overtime as well as
good
Correct article usage
a good
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 salary might become
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
be
workaholic
Fix the agreement mistake
workaholics
show examples
.
As a result
Linking Words
, a workaholic person may neglect their families and friends to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
employer’s
Correct article usage
the employer’s
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 needs requirements which might be followed by parenting
issue
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issues
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 and conflict between spouses. Treating imbalance
work
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time
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 and leisure or family
time
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 may be resolved
Change preposition
by taking
show examples
taking
Change the verb form
to take
show examples
 the
next
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 steps.
Firstly
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,
people
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 need to take regular holidays and do
exercises
Fix the agreement mistake
exercise
show examples
. Happy, healthy and motivated workers are able to achieve greater productivity of their firms.
In addition
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, modern technology allows
people
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 to
work
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 from home or else telecommuting is possible in front of
computer
Correct article usage
a computer
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 or laptop.
Moreover
Linking Words
, some business institutions offer part-
time
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 or flexible working hours and provide childcare facilities as well. Eventually, every person should take
Use synonyms
balance
Correct article usage
a balance
show examples
 between
work
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 and
life
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 to avoid challenging situations.
Remarkable
Correct article usage
A remarkable
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balance
Use synonyms
 state between a good
life
Use synonyms
 and
work
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 can raise one’s job satisfaction. In conclusion, it is important to gain a
balance
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 between
work
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time
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 and leisure
time
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. Having
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
work
Use synonyms
-
life
Use synonyms
balance
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 plays a vital role
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
relationship
Add an article
the relationship
a relationship
show examples
 between a person’s professional
life
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 and his/her personal
life
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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