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Band 8

Some people think that advertising aimed at children should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #children
In
this
 day and age, there is a common belief that
ads
 aimed at
children
 should not be allowed and
this
 seems to be an increasingly common trend in many parts of the world. From my perspective, even though those
ads
 can be good to a certain extent, I believe that they should be banned since they do more harm than good. On the one hand, advertising plays an integral role in the economy could be plausible to some degree.
In other words
, without advertisement, some companies will suffer from an economic depression, which is a driving force behind an employees’ cut.
Therefore
, the unemployment rate will be on the increase, which is a breeding ground for social chaos.
This
 may act as a precursor to not only an increase in the wealth gap but
also
 a financial burden on the government.
However
, advertising and marketing messages are inundating
children
 and teens and significantly contributing to some of the biggest problems facing teens today.
On the other hand
, there is a direct connection between a society’s levels of exposure to advertising and the level of consumption. In fact,
children
 may suffer from frequent exposure to advertisements that their idols endorse the products. Taking the underdeveloped country as a salient example, there is greater exposure to alcohol advertising, which give rise to an increase in drinking among underage youth. Another compelling factor is that advertisements tend to be unrealistic and give a false impression of how the
children
 would be or what will happen when they buy the product.
In other words
, there are numerous products that can pose a threat to
children
although
 they are advertised to be good for
children
.
Therefore
,
this
 is a testament to a ban in the
ads
 aimed at
children
. In conclusion, despite the fact that if there are no
ads
 for
children
, the government can face social chaos, I believe that those
ads
 should be banned.
Submitted by star.nguyenhuyhoang.2409 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • screen time
  • fast food
  • childhood obesity
  • poor nutrition
  • physical education
  • urbanization
  • safety concerns
  • indoor activities
  • outdoor activities
  • health awareness
  • fitness programs
  • exercise routines
  • dietary habits
  • academic priorities
What to do next:
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