IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

People today are increasingly use credit card to make monthly purchases. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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nowadays, the number of people paying monthly purchases has become increasingly common, and like any financial tool, it comes with both advantages and disadvantages. I believe the advantages are far more than the drawbacks because using a
credit
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 card for payment
a
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is a
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more portable way than using cash.
firstly
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, using a
credit
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 card is convenient. we can use it very quickly to make purchases without carrying cash.
moreover
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, some banks offer rewards or discounts
while
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 using the
credit
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 card.
on the other hand
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, it will help to reduce expenditure. not only rewards but
also
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credit
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cards
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 provide a detailed record of transactions of monthly which can be useful for budgeting and tracking expenses.
also
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,
credit
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cards
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 come
along with
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 security features like fraud protections
whereas
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 cash transactions may lack. despite
credit
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 coming
along with
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 many benefits still, there are disadvantages to using
credit
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cards
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.
due to
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 quick way and convenient payments, people may overspend more than their budget
as a result
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 money runs out quickly.
Furthermore
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, some
credit
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cards
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 come with high fees for transactions, people need to be aware of these factors. In conclusion, whether the advantages of using
credit
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cards
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 for monthly purchases outweigh the disadvantages depends on how responsibly individuals manage their finances. When used wisely,
credit
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cards
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 can provide convenience, security, and even financial benefits through rewards.
However
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, if not managed carefully, they can lead to debt and financial challenges. It's crucial for individuals to be aware of their spending habits, pay attention to terms and conditions, and use
credit
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 responsibly to maximize the benefits
while
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 minimizing the risks.

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coherence cohesion
Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices and transition words to link ideas more effectively. This will help the essay flow better from one point to the next, creating a more logical and structured argument.
task achievement
Work on writing a clear and direct thesis statement in your introduction to establish a firm stance on the issue. This will help guide your reader through your arguments and make your position clear.
task achievement
Develop your points by using more relevant and specific examples that firmly back your arguments. General statements are not as convincing as concrete examples drawn from real-life scenarios or credible sources.
coherence cohesion
Strive to create a stronger conclusion by summarizing your key points more effectively and restating your thesis in a way that reflects the arguments presented in your essay.
coherence cohesion
To enhance the coherence and cohesion of your work, pay attention to paragraph structure. Each paragraph should contain one clear main idea, supported by explanations and examples. Avoid merging multiple ideas in one paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Correct grammatical errors and ensure proper sentence structure throughout the essay to improve clarity and readability. Consistent and correct grammar contributes to the cohesion of the text.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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